Hi
I have been at the junction you find yourself at first I too shyed away from feminine looking diapers and diapes in general. Thankfully thanks to the fantastic community here I took the decision to wear proper disposable diapers 24/7. At first I was not sure what to choose however I contacted many diaper manufactures who were kind enough to send free samples that helped. To be quite honest I have reached a point where I forget that I wear diapers and just don't care what others think. I wish I had made the decision years ago I have my confidence and life back.
One point to note though even if the terry reusable or disposable diaper appears to be dry it is not as both absorb sweat and other body fluid and if not regularly changed can cause nasty skin issues in the diaper area. I have attached the below link that contains great advice especially on hygene that I follow to the letter and so far my skin has remained healthy and free of infection etc.
http://www.incontinentsupport.org/primer_index.phpI have found the people here of great help and support time after time whatever the issue large or small are always on hand to help out.
All the best with your hunt for the solution we are all different.
Greenbank