www.incontinentsupport.org

Hi I'm new to the group. I just want to take a few minutes to introduce myself. I'm 35, am happily married and have an amazing 20 month old son. I live in Washington and work as a therapist. I also have mild cerebral palsy.

I've been dealing with incontinence for about two years, but it has been at its current intensity for about two months. It started when I got a bladder infection. My doctors office told me they would not get me in for two weeks. I automatically switched doctors and was able to get in to see someone 4 days later. By that point it had moved into my prostate. I was have stress problems initially but as it progressed it moved into my urgency with frequent wettings. At that point I was put on an antibiotic for three weeks. I wore diapers throughout most of it and finally saw some improvement the final week. After that I was okay but would have "relapses ". Every once in a while I would start having symptoms again: urgency wetting and bedwetting. Usually it would last a couple days, sometimes longer. After a year of this I quit hopping that I would get better and went to a urologist. He had me do a cystoscopy and a flow analysis. He found out that I had an enlarged prostate and that my bladder functioned like a 70 year olds. I was also having mild retention. I was placed in flomax. This helped. I eventually reached the point where I had no symptoms for three months. I threw out all the diapers I had and thought this thing was behind me. After awhile I accidently ran out of Meds. I found I had more energy off of them, so I decided to stay off of them. (Idiot me). Than my incontinence came back with a vengeance. I was having constant urgency gliding myself frequently. I went through about a week where all I used was a diaper. I eventually went back on flomax, but it is not working as before. It took the edge off. I continue to wet multiple times a day flooding 2 to 3 times a week. A couple weeks ago we discovered that my prostate was infected. I was placed on septrra which is flushing my system. I avoid drinking during the,limiting myself to 8 oz. that way I don't overload my pull-up. I'm mostly able to make it the bathroom every 30 min when dehydrated, still having occasional accidents, but have more trouble when drinking lots. I have about a week left on the antibiotic. I'm still wetting several times a day and drenching myself at night. I know some had to do with my drinking pattern. I still have times I'm completely emptying bladder unwillingly.

This had been a hard experience. I have had a lot of feeling of embarrassment, shame, anger, depression, feeling overwhelmed. At times I feel hopeless. Treatment seems to be an all or nothing thing for me. Either they get me working or I'm still in diapers even if there is improvement. I'm afraid of what side effects I may get and am worried that those me be more intrusive to my life than diapers. I worry that they will change me so much that I won't be as good of a father to my son or husband to my wife. It seems like I have a long road ahead of me and there is a lot of unknowns.

Luckily I have loving wife. She has been supportive. She continues to want have intercourse with me. I'm very lucky in that regard. She has told her parents, so I don't need to say anything. I'm nervous about telling mine. They will accept it, I just don't want to have the conversation. I won't see them until April so I'm holding off for a little while. I have a therapist I have been talking to about this which helps. At home me and my wife just try to laugh and joke about it to make it easier. I'm doing everything I can to stay positive at this point. I have been reading posts on this forum for weeks and have found this to be incredibly helpful and encouraging.

So that's me and my story so far.

Hi MightyChipmunk, welcome aboard! Nice introduction write-up, although I am sure you would much rather not to have to write something like that at ALL! I also have urge issues along with night time too, although I can manage rather well after so long, I am getting to know just when I need to wear and when I can get by without it, although that is rare and only for short trips out, or where I know where the bathroom will be. I also had an infection "downstairs" years ago, ended up resulting in surgery, and now it is chronic non-bacterial prostatitus, so I can relate to what you have gone thru... not much fun when your plumbing gets a mind of it's own and starts to not co-operate so much anymore, NOT something that guys in their 30's or 40's expects to happen until way later in life, if at all. Hang in there, and if you feel the need to vent off some steam, we are listening! Puffy

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Puffy
BC, Canada
Fighting the "Bladder Battle" since 1995

Hello Mightychipmunk,

Let me add my welcome to Puffy Pants' earlier one.

You have been through a lot but appear to be coping with it effectively.

As you probably know by now, the members here have a wide variety of incontinence issues and many, many years of experience in living with it. Everyone has been helpful. I am bowel incontinent. Some are double incontinent. If you have any questions, ask away.

The message archives contain a treasure trove of useful information and were very helpful for me when my fecal incontinence became markedly worse. Do take a look at them.

It is good that you have a supportive family and are seeing a therapist. I have learned that the emotional component of incontinence is very important and tends to be neglected. It is so easy to feel isolated. The old advice to just "suck it up" just does not work. It is helpful to be able to share with others who are living with similar issues. This forum can help in that regard.

As my parents used to remind me when I was a teenager, "Life is not fair." How right they were.

Best wishes,
--JD

Hi! Stacy here. Another newbie to the site. Looking forward to become an active member of this forum and share ideas and information on incontinence.

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Adult Diapers

Hi Stacy I'm Sandy use to be big on this board not so much anymore. Am I to assume you are Female? If you are Great This board is mostly men Would love to talk with another female on this board. Sandy