www.incontinentsupport.org

I think the majority of folks would say that Gary at XP Medical is the by far the best supplier for disposables. His prices are very competitive, he ships quickly and he carries the better brands such as Abena, Molicare, and Dry24/7. (xpmedical.com)

-Ray

I concur with the advice of using Gary at XP as a supplier. I have tried all his brands. He is by far the best. The VA uses him to buy my supplies every month. He gives great service. My primary advice however, would be to see a urologist to determine the cause.

Tim,

I can relate to your issues. I'm 28 myself and here recently have run into night issues as well as daytime frequency/urgency. I ended up getting blood work, x-rays, a prostate exam and urodynamics (probably the worse experience of my life!). He's yet to find a smoking gun and wants to do a cystoscopy. I started out with sub par stuff that leaked but eventually ordered some Abena x-plus for night use. I'll give another recommendation for XP and their decent prices and fast shipping.

Good luck. Keep us posted.

XP sounds like a very well recommended company. I will check them out as I run low on what I have.

By way of an update: Things aren't improving. I haven't had a dry night in over a week now. I don't think I've ever actively wished so hard that a doctor would call me to tell me that a test came back positive for infection... /sigh... Since that hasn't happened, I'm left assuming that the urinalysis and blood work was normal, which in this case is a bummer. c'est la vie.

I've also learned that my wife shared my, ahem, issue with her mother, which bums me out. I really like my mother in-law, actually, but since I'm still swimming down the river of denial, I really didn't want anyone else to know. I'm not particularly upset with my wife. If this is even close to as difficult for her to deal with as it is me, then she needed somebody to talk to. It just sucks...

My IVP was rescheduled for Thursday, and my follow up with my GP isn't until the following Friday. I feel like I'm 8 again, since 2 weeks seems like an eternity. Especially since I really don't have high expectations with the GP and figure I'm going to end up at a urologist. I just want to know, and know now...

The waiting is the hard part. I had a few x-rays taken but there were no obvious reason as to why I'm having issues. I hope your doctor sees something that might be causing your issue.

My wife had been fighting insomnia for a few nights when I started having issues. During that week I had two accidents before she found out and luckily my wife was on the couch each time. I was able to get the sheets in the dryer each time. She never made the connection until she covered up with a blanket that I didn't throw in the wash since I thought it was clean. To say I was embarrassed would be an understatement. I started reading everything I could find online and when she made a joke about depends I came to the conclusion that I should do something about it. It was really hard buying depends the first time and even harder showing her that I bought them! She was very supportive and told me that I didn't need them and we would deal with cleaning up together. I explained to her that waking up every time it happened would get very old and that using something was the way I was choosing to deal with it.

Did I mention this happened two weeks before going on a family vacation? I ended up taking quite a few depends with me. The baby, the hard bed, and just being paranoid about wetting kept me up a lot so that combined with changing kept the beds dry. I was able to keep anyone in the family from finding out... or so I thought...

I suspected my wife told my mother-in-law even though she denied it. I knew she told her about the frequency and urgency issues. She also let slip she told her about the first two times I had accidents. I was pretty frustrated with that. My mother-in-law is like my real mother to me, so I wasn't too mad at my wife, but more embarrassed that someone else knew that I was having accidents at night. Later on I found out she told her that I was using depends and that the issues had not stopped. How did you put it? C'est la vie... especially when you're married! It was through my wife and mother-in-law's suggestions that I went to the doctor.

After a prostate exam, urodynamics, bladder dye tests, all the doctor says is that I have a small bladder capacity and he wants to do a cystoscopy. I'm also on sanctura which seems to be helping the frequency. The tech said I also appeared to have some retention but not enough to suggest anything and the doctor didn't mention this. I'll let you know how that goes, I cancelled the appointment until I get the bills in from the other tests (hah). I hope you get some answers before you get run through the ringer.


Hang in there, Tim. This is a pretty frustrating time. I know you're embarrassed. I can only suggest being completely open with your wife if you're having trouble opening up. I had a tough time doing this. My wife admitted that she spoke to her mom about it because I wouldn't open up to her.I had a tough time talking about depends, and still have a hard time talking about diapers even though it's been almost two months since I switched. I can joke with her about it, and I still get a little embarrassed, but being open with her has been the most helpful to me.

If you need to talk to someone, feel free to get in touch with me. I don't mind talking and sharing my experiences. You can write here, PM me, or I'll send you a message with my email.

Rick,

PM sent, and... thanks, man.


Tim

You may reconsider cloth diapers and vinyl plastic pants for nighttime. I used to leak with disposable night diapers and made the switch back to cloth. I am a side sleeper at times and never leak and wake very wet without fail. Since I am 24/7 I have a diaper service where I provide the diapers and they do the washing. They did sell me a ton of used prefold toddler diapers way cheap that I use with 36 x 36 flat diapers. With this system I can add layers of protection as needed, and less when not needed. The initial investment was worth the saving and comfort. Cloth diapers and vinyl plastic pants are way more comfortable once you get used to the bulk. The other thing I swear by are the snappi diaper fasteners used for toddlers. I never have to mess with diaper pins when doing diaper changes.

If/when I come to the end of the road with the docs and then if this looks to be a long-term problem, I will definitely consider cloth. I'm not there yet, mentally or otherwise. Spending a few hundred bucks on something that's intended to last a long time would feel like admitting defeat at this point...

I did order a bag of Abena's and a couple of pair of plastic pants. Hopefully that fixes the leaking issue for now...

My wetting started in my early 50's and has not stopped.The best diaper for me a side sleeper is welliness but none perfect so ordered some cloth diapers and rubber pants.

Once a bedwetter, always a bedwetter? I think bedwetting, if lucky, goes dormant for years but ends up coming back. My high school friend who was able to fight it off, had it come back on him too. Luckily he was no stranger to protection but to doesn't lessen the blow.