www.incontinentsupport.org

Hi! /shywave

I wet the bed up until I was about 13-14 years old. For some reason it stopped, we were never sure why, of course, I was thankful for it. At that age, when you are trying so hard to be an adult, competing with your peers, nobody wants to be wetting the bed and wearing diapers. Very hard to deal with, psychologically. That only lasted until...a few months ago, now. I'm really not sure how long it has been anymore. Anyway, I'm 24 now.

I've read that sometimes, if you wet the bed into your teen years, it can come back in your adult years. Is this true? My problems have returned with the exact same frequency (basically every night) and amount (floods). I am still living at home, with my parents, and I've kept this from them successfully. This is really not something they could cope with well or handle maturely (which is why I haven't yet sought professional medical advice). Unless it gets worse I am sure it is just a re-occurrence of my childhood problems.

Initially I tried using Depends to help...it was what I wore back as a kid. Surprised to find that they don't have just "small" sizes now they are small/medium. I remember opening packages that just said "small" on them. And they don't look anything alike, they used to be called "overnights" and were in red/blue packaging. Now it's this horrifying sea-green color and "fitted maximum protection (HAH)." Anyway that is what fit me, the small/medium. Found out they are just as useless now as they were back then. Still required me to do the laundry. So, like everything else I do, I turned to the internet to find a better solution to my problem.

Discovered the existence of the whole AB/DL scene. That was, um, interesting, to discover. But, whatever floats your boat, I am not one to judge. I'll admit diapers are pretty comfy while dry but I'd gladly take no problems and "slightly less comfy" normal underwear, any day, if I could get that.

I guess I have those folks to thank though because via them and the stuff they've written online, I discovered Abenas which are practically a godsend. Rather thick and bulky (I use the most absorbent kind, the X-pluses), but I only need them at bedtime and luckily my dog is not judgmental at all . But, oh my, they are great, for dealing with this. Have not had any leaks so far, and when I go, I flood. And I don't wake up with that horrible "soaked" feeling either that I did with the Depends. Probably helps that everything stays in the diaper rather than leaking out.

Anyway lately I've been researching medications that could help me with my problem (I'm a bachelor, and happy this way, but, I'm still pretty young and I can't imagine too many girls who would willingly hook up with a guy with this problem. Kind of intrusive into the more intimate parts of a relationship, even when it is only bedwetting). But, what I read, just makes me more and more and more uncomfortable. It almost seems like you are pretty much asking for really bad side effects, and a "partial cure" to your incontinence. Unfortunately that means I would still need to wear a diaper to bed every night. I can probably deal with that (and hey, if I'm hooking up with a girl for life, to get married, I want one that can handle all of me, the good and the bad).

It almost makes going to the doctor look like it is NOT worth it. Do they really make you do a bunch of testing before they prescribe a medication? With my history of bedwetting, and a recurrence of the same problem is it possible they would put me on a trial of medication and avoid the testing? Because I'll be honest, I am much, much happier with the diapers than I would be the kind of intrusive tests I read about them doing for incontinence. I might be willing to try some kind of medication to see if it would work 100%, and not give me bad side effects. And, if my problem got worse (where I was wetting when fully conscious) I would definitely go. But as of now I'm not too terribly inclined. I'm 99.99% sure I know what it is, and the alternative seems more unpleasant. Diapers are a burden and pretty expensive but I can deal with that.

Is there anybody here on meds for bedwetting? How expensive are they?

I was also planning to try and get on a police force somewhere. It is a career track I would really like to enjoy. However, Academy worries me. I'm not sure if that is a deal-breaker for police forces (it shouldn't be, since it's a disability that would only affect me when I'm off-duty...). Do you actually sleep at the training grounds, for any of you who have or have relatives who have gone to police academy? Or, do you HAVE to sleep there? I imagine so given what I have heard about it. Can accommodations be made for someone like me? Do I just have to deal with the ridicule, hope people are adult about it, or do I need to choose a different career path?

I think you should see a doctor. It is not uncommon for bedwetting to return in older adults, but I would get checked out just to be sure. Since you don't have incontinence problems during the day time and its only at night, you could ask your doctor about DDAVP. Its a bedwetting drug they use for children and teens. I took it, but it didn't work for me. But my incon issues sound like they are more severe than yours and they have different causes. So you may have better luck with DDAVP. Its either a pill I believe or a nasal spray. Its a really common drug and I don't recall it being expensive. This is something your family doctor should check out. He may send you to a urologist but the tests are bearable. They may look for something called a urethral stricture. This is something the urologist can take care of. Strictures cause bedwetting in adults. If the uro doc takes care of this for you, if you have one, it should solve your bedwetting. They are pretty common and the tests are no big deal. A little uncomfortable but thats it.

Might try that. Thank you for the advice. Puts me a bit at ease concerning the whole doctor issue as I have read a lot of horror stories about it. Would be nice to have a med that actually works, and hopefully minimal/no side effects.

Like I said I am single, and plan to remain so, but if that would ever change, needing to wear diapers to bed I'd think is a great way to screw up a relationship . That is a lot to ask any girl to deal with.

WolfyMan,
I have been a user of DDAVP in the past, and I've had limited success with it. I am full blown incontinent being in diapers around the clock. Why I use it is to have limited wettings during the day or night and it works. If I try to stay dry during the day, it does work. They do not recommend you stay on this drug 24 hours a day. So when you're off it, you start weting again and in a big way.

This drug is now in generic form so it's pretty cheap. Of coarse, you'll need to see a doctor to get a prescription which is a good ideal as Don suggested. Good luck and welcome to the forum. We are all here to help! .....Paul Martin

When I was younger I went through a couple of years of doctors and specialists, tried a lot of meds. The ones that did help control my problem all had pretty nasty side effects, so I just stuck with wearing protection. At least with diapers I know exactly what to expect.



Now being IC is nothing to put yourself down about. As Dr. Seuss put it, "Be who you are and say what you feel, for those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." More simply, the right girl will accept you for who you are, faults or not.

_________________
~~PuddleGuy

Get to a doctor. From what I have read bedwetting can come back to haunt adults who had wet the bed as a child but you should have a doctor make that determination. It could be something fairly easy to combat. Just the same I think you'd like to know what is causing it. I wet the bed from around 8 years of age up until shortly before my 16th birthday. My parents took me to several specialists only to have the medical community tell them that I was small for my age and so was my bladder and that someday it would grow and I would stop wetting at night. Most children that suffer from enuresis do "grow" out of it and in many cases it is something simple like a small bladder. When an adult starts wetting for no apparent reason it is usually something a little more complicated. See a doctor. I am totally bladder incontinent now due to injuries suffered in a car/semi accident. I went through a couple years worth of tests but they were worth it. Now I know what is causing me to have no control of my bladder. I may not like the result but at least I'm not wondering if there is something medical that could be done to give me back control of my bladder.

Yeah, that's sort of my thought. I don't like the idea of using chemicals to alter my body to manage a problem that can be managed in a much less intrusive manner. That's what diapers are made for and TBH at this current stage of my life the diapers are just fine. I think I've made peace with them, heh.

Now, if I needed temporary nighttime continence, if there was a pill that could do that, I could deal with the side effects. But for life-long management, no, I don't like that. If I needed protection 24/7 maybe, then yeah, at least something to reduce the frequency of accidents would be nice. But, I don't care how often or how much I go when I'm sleeping...the diapers I wear now have handled everything I can throw at them .

I guess I am still on the fence about seeing a doctor. I *know* I should, and even if I'm 99% sure what the cause of it is (well at least that it's the same thing that caused it as a kid), but, well, there's always a chance the family finds out and that is stress and problems I do NOT need to be dealing with right now. Not because they will pry into my medical life but if I'm suddenly making doctors trips and not telling them why (usually I say why I'm going, just so they know...so there's one thing out of the ordinary), and then making trips into a big city about an hour away to see a urologist that I'm referred to...questions are asked and as I'm on good terms with my family it is hard to just tell them "it's private, none of your business" or lie to them. I'm terrible at lying :S.

If I notice anything else wrong with my body, or my problem gets worse, then heck yes, don't much care if they find out, I'm going to see the doctor no ifs ands or buts. But, with things as they are...I'm sitting on the fence :S. Thanks for the input, it helps, but, I guess I am just not 100% of the way there where I want to find out what is the cause.

I'm going to disagree with you. I don't think you should just accept diapers as a way of dealing with this problem. They are not the end all be all. I would rather find out what the cause is and get it taken care of. If its something that can be fixed, then fix it. If it can't be fixed, then by all means, accept the diapers. But don't cheat yourself out of a potential cure. The medications have side effects sure, but you probably would not have to go on them because you're not daytime incontinent. You have control in the day. Your problem is only at night. I think you owe it to yourself to find the cause. It may not be anything serious; it could be something simple. And curable!

As far as your family goes, they should be supportive. You don't have to tell them why you're going to the doctor. Just tell them you have a medical condition and you are seeing a specialist. No big deal. I have told both my family and my wifes family that I am incontinent. And you know what? They were ok with it. The general consensus was "wow, thats terrible". I didn't get any questions. All I got was love and understanding. That came from both my parents and family and my in-laws. Totally understanding! No sweat! Give it a shot, Please don't just accept the diapers! There may be a cure for you.

Well they aren't like, intrusive or anything, as is. I mean I did take quite awhile to finally just accept them but its not like they alter my life any or make me do anything much different. My social life hasn't taken a turn for the worse or anything. Like you said it is just nighttime incontinence. I would have a lot harder time accepting them as a means of management if it were daytime too. Well, I would not accept them as a solution in that case.

I might work my way around to getting into the doctor, I guess. Worst comes to worst, if the meds are giving me any side effects, I just say no, and go back to the diapers. Nothing changes and I am only out a few co-payments. My outlook can only improve I guess...although that is rather depressing way of looking at the matter :S.

If there's a cure, then great, that would be immensely lighter on my wallet :S. Diapers are definitely not cheap.

Insurance should cover most of the doctor's visits and stuff so I guess there is no reason NOT to go...just gotta swallow my pride and do it.

I tried the DDAVP for a while. Was very expensive at the time, something like $75 a month. Also, in the morning after it wore off I wet like a horse so I didn't gain anything with it.
I've tried other medications too and the side effects just weren't worth it IMHO.