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Support for dealing with incontinence
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 06, 2009 2:30 pm 
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Joined: Sat Dec 27, 2008 12:38 pm
Posts: 16
Yes, true. I know their decision has to be what's best for their children, I just hope that Jane or their children don't get shortchanged in the process.

You are absolutely right about the sex before marriage thing causing a higher rate of divorce. It's been shown statistically and I also have observed it pragmatically. The problem is people think you're old fashioned if you wait but I personally would rather wait and have the marriage last than do it the other way around. Horse before the carriage, not the other way around. :wink: Plus, if he is a true man and really loves her, he will respect her and himself and wait (and so will she, vise versa).

How is Jane doing today? Is she starting to come around and be more of her old self? You can tell her she has supportive people here, as I am sure I speak for everyone that we are so sorry she had to go through that. I remember when it happened to me and the only thing that saved my hide from the ultimate embarrassment was that I was about 15 ft. from the nearest person and was able to scedaddle out of there.

Anyway, I hope you guys don't mind me coming on periodically, having suffered from past incontinence as I do understand where you guys all are; perhaps I can give some input. So far my surgery has held up since 2002, only time will tell when parts start wearing out again (I am 40) if it will last.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 06, 2009 5:03 pm 
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Location: Wisconsin
I've said it before and I'll say it again. One of the biggest problems people face in the start of a relationship is they mistake Lust for Love :shock: Jane seems back to herself We were camping this weekend. Jane and the kids went with us so together we were one big Family. Some people we knew asked if Jane was a sister or something we smiled and said well kinda :wink: .................Sandy :)


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 06, 2009 6:24 pm 
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That's awesome! A camping trip sounds like it was what was needed to put the past traumatic experience out of her mind. Sounds like you all had a good time.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 07, 2009 9:16 pm 
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Joined: Tue Apr 01, 2008 12:31 pm
Posts: 115
Location: Indiana
Just now being able to sit down and catch up with whats been going on.

Sandy, I have said it before and others too, You are one special person. Your the one in a million that many could only dream about being like. Thanks to you and your husband for all the love and support you have given Jane, your younger friend and everyone here on this board. Knowing that there are caring people out there does make things a lot better.


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 07, 2009 11:44 pm 
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Location: Wisconsin
Thanks for the kind words. But I'm also blessed in having Jane and the kids along with my young friend..............Sandy :)


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 17, 2009 9:22 pm 
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Location: Wisconsin
a little update
My young friend her mother and her Ant went out west for two plus weeks. They should be back in a few days. I got a post card from yellow stone and a few days after that one from Reno. Do you think she has excepted her condition :D I'm so proud of her.

Jane has been great! Kids are wonderful Work is over the top busy. I think I may have spoke about this before but one of our Mechanics still has an eye on Jane. I'm still not sure she has picked up on it yet. I'm staying out of it. Well at least I'm trying to :wink: Jane has been staying here during the week more often then not. Her mother has been watching the kids during the day and then drops them off after supper most nights. We've been so busy. It's been working out better this way. The last few weeks Jane has been going into overtime by the middle of wednesday afternoon. In fact here it is 8:00 pm and she is still out doing paper work. I feel kinda guilty sitting in my office with Janes kids in the house with me. The youngest is on the floor here playing inside of a empty Attends box :lol: I tell you we must have about $1.000 worth of toys in this house and here the youngest one is having the time of it's life playing in a cardboard box :roll: Well anyway something starting to smell bad in here and I know it isn't me :roll: Got to go and take care of someones yuckies :roll: ............................Sandy :)


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 10:07 am 
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Sandy,
This is the young friend who switched to cloth diapers most of the time?
That's what causes me some concern on an extended trip (packing enough diapers). If you're packing cloth diapers, you can get by with a lot less luggage. I have had bad luck trying to buy my supply while traveling. You'll be stuck buying Depends or something like them.

Sounds like Jane is realing fitting in at your work place. Keep up the good work. ..........Paul Martin


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 12:52 pm 
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Joined: Sat Aug 23, 2008 3:04 pm
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Location: SLC
Packing enough diapers and not too many is certainly a fine art... and it is one that I have yet to master. We don't really go on that many overnight trips (can't afford to) so I don't have a lot of opportunity to practice.

Generally I try to pack 4 disposables per day. I average between 2 and 3 diapers per day so I figure 4 should keep everything covered in case something unexpected happens. But then you get things like beach trips where a lot of swimming and being outside is involved, and it throws my count all off.

Anyone have similar experiences?

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 4:59 pm 
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:D I haven't been able to read all of this thread as it's quite long, but from what I've seen.... what wonderful support there is that's developed between Sandy and Jane, and Sandy's other friend...! I believe God really does bring people together to bring His love to each other in support and true friendship. Sandy it must have taken so much care and tact to know how to give support, particularly at the start of these encounters, and you've clearly been such a help and guidance to the other two ladies. It sounds as if you are all a blessing to each other now - praying that all continues to go very well for you and them.


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 19, 2009 5:21 pm 
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Location: Wisconsin
Thank you for the kind words. I found that not forcing an issue often works best. I needed to be a little firm with my young friend. But had to be careful not to cause more damage. I spent allot of time praying and asking for guidance. As you can see it payed off. I'm so blessed to have that young lady as a friend. I knew her mother for years and never really got to know her daughter until she became incontinent.

Jane already had an ok grip on her incontinence. But did need some guidance. on how to dress proper and the different types of protection that are out there. Jane is allot more like me. For the fact she tends not to get into the fashion thing she's more the jeans T-shirt type :) Jane is more of a younger sister to me then just a friend or even a best friend. There isn't anything my husband or I wouldn't do for her. ..........Sandy :)


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