www.incontinentsupport.org

http://tinyurl.com/q6oojx

...a huge slap in the face to truly incontinent people everywhere.

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"Cats' whiskers are so sensitive, they can find their way through the narrowest cracks of a broken heart"

I've seen this posted on a number of diaper related sites.

Honestly, it's crap.

This woman knew what she was doing... and she only complained when the money stopped coming.

She didn't have a problem with it when she was being paid.

So IMO she has no right to complain about being taken advantage of.

Any nurse or medical professional would know that bottle feeding is not used in a medical setting. If patients cannot handle solid foods they are fed by IV or tube.

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~~PuddleGuy

It came up on my internet news feed several days ago. I think the thing that bothers me about it is not that the woman felt she was taken advantage of but rather that there are creeps that do this for kicks.

Before I had surgery for my incontinence, I was so embarrassed about it that I hid it from everyone except my mother and that was only because I knew she was also dealing with it as well. Had I known at the time that there are people out there who pretend to be incontinent for kicks I would have been afraid that if people found out I had this condition might think that I also 'did it' for kicks. Plus the fact that this guy up and drove off in a car suddenly becoming normal, without handicap. Can you imagine - lets see, today I will wear and use diapers or pads. Tomorrow I won't. Must be nice to just *decide* when you are going to have control of your bladder and when not, when incontinent people can't stop the flow as it hits. I had to get surgery done to get that ability to *decide* back!

Not to mention the other handicaps - lets see today I can walk, tomorrow I will spend my day in a wheelchair and pretend I can't. Grrr. Sorry, had to vent.

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"Cats' whiskers are so sensitive, they can find their way through the narrowest cracks of a broken heart"

Piddlefree,

I can completely understand your anger in this case. I too am more than a little PO'ed about it. It could/would cause the public to view those of us with a true problem suspiciously. It's bad enough to have to go out into the public with a diaper wrapped around your arse, and even though I've never had anyone make a comment or ask me about it, it still makes me wonder just what they may be thinking, "Is he really in need of them, or just some sick A-hole out for kicks?".

It took me a long, long time to be comfortable with being out in public without fear of discovery, and I take every measure I can to hide it and insure it's not obvious that I'm diapered, and if I have an "issue" in public, I make sure to go get it taken care of as quickly as possible and not offend anyone with my odor.

People like that just portray everyone truly in need in a bad light, and it's not easy to change the publics view of things. Add to that the stigma attached to wearing a diaper, and it only compounds the problem.

I think he should be made to wear one over his head in public for a month in punishment for his callous disregard of all the truly incontinent people's problems with their own self image, and that of the public's acceptance of them as well. (I think I've expressed what I wanted in the way I worded it).

I feel nothing but simpathy for those victims he has used for his own sick pleasures. I also believe that he should be made to pay them every dime he promised them for his "care". Perhaps that will discourage any further pranks or deceptions on his part, and serve as an example to others thinking of doing such things.

On another note, I'm glad you have been able to overcome this problem. I still hold out hope that one day I may as well, despite what my doctors have said.

Rick C.

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Some people say I have drain bamage because I'm always getting my mords wixed up! But you know dislexics are teople poo!!
And one day when I stop hurting I'll feel better too!

I really don't comprehend the incontinent community's intense hatred of AB/DLs.

It's a big, wide world out there with lots of different people. You aren't going to agree with every single one of them, you might think some of them are down right strange... but that does not give you the right to hate them or to be bigoted against them.

I've talked to a number AB/DLs... and even met several. My fiancee is one (gasp!). They are really a misunderstood group. The vast majority of them were born with AB/DL desires, it's not something you just choose to be, and many would gladly rid themselves of it and live like "normal" human beings if they could. But they can't... so they do what they can to live happy pleasurable lives.

Every once in a while a story will get out about someone who took things too far... but you have to realise that those folks you read about in the news are really in a minority among the hundreds of thousands of individuals worldwide with that particular persuasion. So let's not hate what we don't comprehend.

I also don't understand why so many in the incontinent community act like they mope around and are miserable all day just because they have to wear a diaper. Get over it folks. There is a lot of life to live out there... and if you look at the grand scheme of things incontinence really isn't very high on the list of "disabilities" that effect the quality of someone's life.

I still do everything a continent person does... I work, I play sports and games, I tinker on cars, I go swimming and rafting... I don't let something as insignificant as a lack of bladder control slow me down. But if I listen to the things folks say on some incontinence boards, I should hate my life because of this. Be positive people! Be thankful that you wake up every morning and can take that first breath of fresh air for the day. Life tosses us all curve balls, and we are defined on how we handle them. You can let it strike you out... or you can knock it out of the park. I'm gonna enjoy my life, I'm gonna be happy, and I'm not gonna let the obstacles slow me down.

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~~PuddleGuy

Very well said Puddleguy. While I struggle to understand the whole AB/DL thing And I use to be the first one on the attack of one if one would show up on a board like this. But then after I thought about it I thought Why am I attacking the very people that would be excepting of my condition?? Granted this doesn't mean I want them on the board playing me/us for thier own gratification. Please if you are an AB/DL and enjoy that fetish please stay on the AB/DL boards rather then share it with us that have honest Medical conditions and have no choice. However if you have something constructive to say I'd be all ears.......Sandy

Here's my opinion of the AB/DL crowd.

This article about this man who pretended to have these needs did go too far in his charade. I'm not against this crowd if they stick to themselves and do their things privately. I don't agree going out to the world and showing off you have a diaper on for kicks. That is being a pervert.
However, if a couple wants to do this privately that will not effect others, let them do it.
Where would this AB/DL group be without the internet? Nowhere! The internet has broadcast their views for all to see. But I believe we have the best selection of incontinent supplies because of them, especially in cloth diapers/plastic pants. I can put up with them just as long as they don't throw it into our face. My two cents worth...............Paul Martin

Hi everyone,

I had some reservations in responding and adding my two cents, but I think my comments are in keeping with the general consensus of the topic. First, it would be appropriate to provide some background foundation on how I viewed this entire AB/DL lifestyle.

My own problems in the early 1970's with incontinence were emotionally devastating for me. I was lost in my own world for several years until I met up with a newly formed self-help group in Chicago. My life took a turn for the better, and I took steps to put these incontinence issues behind me. I beleive I said in an earlier post that I was instrumental in bringing this organization in to Canada, and I sat on its first Board of Directors for many years. I also did a lot of peer counselling, and media presentations in Canada and the U.S. The peer counselling opened my eyes with the AB/DL crowd, which is predominantly male, but also includes females and same sex relationships.

While I have tried not to be judjmental or accusing in other ways, I have at times felt exploited by some of the questions that I have been asked which I considered to be very private, and have to do with involvement of my own family members. In time, I learned to perceive that these people were "getting off" on the discussions, which were not on the internet like today, but by phone, and sometimes face to face.

I had wondered what the difference was in regards to AB and DL. I think that with at least one of them there is a regression factor and a need emotionally to regress.

I need to say that there are those that are genuinely incontinent who have learned to like their diapers or coping mechanism. I have met this type as well. This is a learned accepted process as opposed to those that are triggered by something at birth or early in their developement.

Whatever, in my opinion both are acceptable unless another person is exploited and made to fell they have been taken advantage of. Most of us go to great lengths to conceal our need to wear protection, and personally unless I am asked I keep it private. Many of my colleagues know that I have this condition, but very few of them know how I deal with it or what I wear on a day to day basis.

Another thing, I don't see anything wrong with being picky and choosy with what you wear for protection. We all like to look good, and before I had incontinence that included looking good with fashionable under clothes.

I am very close friends with the Founder of the U.S. organization and sit on many Panels related to incontinence and it's management. In Canada, I work in a medical clinic, but in a legal capacity. My name on this Board is confidential, but if a memeber is interested in knowing who I am send me a private email and you can do the google thing to learn more.

So, what this guy did was trashy, but we should not judge a entire community by the actions of a few uncontrolled perversions. Like many of the posts here, it does appear the AB/DL crowd and their numbers have influenced the incontinence market, which is something the genuine support groups continue to do as well.

My 2 cents!

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HarperLee

Thank you for the wise and kind words Harper. I believe you hit the nail on the head.

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~~PuddleGuy

Harperlee,
That was well said. I like your perspective on that matter.Not all AB/DL's are not perverts. I can live with them with no problem. Thanks for your two cents worth! ...............Paul Martin