Hey there, sociologygeek, I do think you should try a pull on diaper!
First, you've tried the store brand and yes, they are pathetic and not even in the running! You need to try a "real" pull on, such as an Abena or a Medline available from xpmedical.com
I try to steer people away from these "convenient" underwear like diapers since they are held up with an elastic waist and they droop/sag when they get wet. Changing them means pulling a new one up your legs which means you have to get out of your shoes and pants....taping on a new diaper is so much easier with less undressing.
But in your case, you are trying to use the toilet and the pull on diaper would be, for the most part, "just in case" protection. They are wonderful in that role! Peace of mind is there in case you need it. Minor leaks will be contained and not slow you down. The good ones can hold a fair amount before they start to sag, and most of all, the good ones are there for the "flood" which can be a disaster when wearing a lesser pull on diaper.
I think you will find, in spite of the higher cost of the good pull ons, the fit and comfort will be worth it, as will the performance...which will be there when you need it!
If you do get some Abena "Aberi-Flex" underwear, please do let us know what you think of them, as many others are into the underwear style diaper and not happy with the lesser brands but hate spending the money for the good ones....wondering if they are worth it.
JoeK
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