www.incontinentsupport.org

Hi DJ,
Thanks for posting for the first time. I think you'll find a lot of support here. Ron is among a lot of men who's prostate has started to act up and incontinence occurs. Keep close touch with your urololist. They seem to want to push drugs first with surgery at a last resort.
Many wifes of men with your problem can be helpful and understanding, but might push you to use the least amount of protection. It certainly can cause a strain in a marriage. However, you are the one with the problem. You know what works best. It's a lot better to be over protected than under protected. My wife was the same way. She thought that I depended too much on diapers. My incontinece just kept getting worse until I ended up with practcally no control. I'm in diapers all the time now. When I first wanted to switch from disposable to cloth, she objected, but I do the wash, and she saw how much money we could save over time. I've been in diapers full time now for 8 years. She has totally accepted it.
Good luck, and post any other questions you may have. .......Paul Martin

Thank you for your response to my questions. I see the doc. once a year and so far my psa no. have stayed at 1.1- 1.2. While going through this I was up about twice a night, disrupted sleep didn't help my mood any. I started to use diapers at night and now I sleep through the night, waking up wet is better then walking around all day in a daze. At first I cut back on my liquids this help me from going so often but when I had to go I had a hard time. I have sence gone back to drinking more water but now going alot more. Is there an amount that someone should drink during the day?I think that as time goes on I whill get more comfortable with what is happening to my body and the steps I need to use to live a more enjoyable life. By the way Iam 60.
Thanks DJ

DJ,
Your PSA sounds good. Mine has been hovering at that number for years. I have heard you should drink about 8-8oz bottles of water per day, but I have also heard that's too much. I think you need to drink what feels comfortable to you. Holding back water/fluid intake is really a bad ideal. It has a lot of bad side effects. Too much water is bad too. I have a friend who was trying to hydrate himself for an up coming strenuous hike. He ended up in the hospital. Really messed him up. He recovered, but he had no ideal what problem could occur drinking too much.
Your night time sleep problem sounded a lot like mine. My wife lost sleep too from me getting out of bed so much. I was wearing a bed wetting alarm to catch my self, but it didn't sound soon enough to keep me from wetting. My under wear was still wet every time. She agreed that I should just wear a diaper and forget the alarm. We both sleep much better now! ......................Paul Martin

Hello
I'm new to this site and suffer from Urge Incontinence as a result of colostomy surgery. Your posts strike a cord with me as I'm struggling to balance the 'urge to go' and occaisional accidents, with wearing incontinece pads during the day. I don't have an issue with wearing diapers at night as I've been sleep wetting heavily now for three years. I've accepted that wearing diapers at night is part of my life. However, I'm not completely sold on the idea during the day.
How do others deal with urge incontinence?

Having to wear diapers both day and night now, I have reached the conclusion that this is now a part of my life. Having accepted this I 'am starting to feel more at ease and enjoying my everyday life.If you can wear diapers at night its not much of a step to use them during the day. I found it hard at first but now feel better about it. It takes time but you will become more at ease about it.
DJ

Hi DJ
Thank you for your encouraging support. As my incontinence is gradually worsening, I'm sure I'll end up going for the diapers day and night option. Could I ask how you use your diipaers during the day please? Do you replace them after each accident, or do you change after several accidents or at preset times?
Richard

Hi Richard44
I usually will change after a few times, but that will depend on the type of diaper you you use. I use cloth at night and disposable during the day. I have tryed alot of different brands and found Abri-form super work the best for me. In my job I can't change when I need to some times so I use a poise pad with the diaper. This gives me extra time between changes. Also I use plastic pants in case of leaks.
DJ

Hi Richard and all yes the urge just seems to get worse still have a little control but not very good had a small accident today too far from restroom.Secure has a good diaper but still not perfect,still looking.

The best advise I can give anyone that is, or has become urge incontinent is accept it for what it is as soon as possible. The faster you can make "acceptance" of using protection, the better you will feel. If meds work for you great, if not, don't become a slave to the bathroom because its not going to do any good anyway.......you will still be incontinent and wet some. Try out differnt products until you find the type that works best for you. I like to use one type of diaper during the day, and a different type for night, or extended wear. Booster pad can also be usefull, so try using those and see if they work for you. Once I accepted using the diaper and gave up being a slave to the bathroom I can't tell you how much better I felt. It was like someone took a 1,000 lbs off my shoulders. It takes a little getting use to, but after a while you don't really even think about the urge problem any more.

I am almost totally inctontinet now (bladder & bowel) and I have accepted it. I was bladder incontinet for over 20 years, and little by little I'm close to being bowel incontinent now too. I don't let either of these issues hold me back from doing anything, or going places. I keep moving forward

Wow, sandy, your incon sounds just like mine, even the time frames...




This sounds a LOT like my situation was. While i very rarely got my pants wet, it seemed like i always had a wet spot on my underwear.



Yep, my break down point was January 2008. I started buying pads for men.

[quote= "Sandy"]
It was then I had to go to the belted undergarment. Well as I've said before in other post I held on to them way to long. It was while I was in the belted ones that the urge incontinence started. [/quote]
Seems almost identical to me too.

Where i differ, is that i am aware when i leak, i think most of the time. at least i think i am. But there was times wehre i had wet spots when i dont know how it got there

Sandy, reading your post was a great help to me. I'm 25 now, and like u, have had uncontrollable floods. I can sometimes clench it back, but i feel most secure in an adult brief

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