www.incontinentsupport.org

Thanks again everyone. It's good to know so many care. I didn't want to water down the original post with all the details of how I got there because I know the main body of the post would be long. I will be truthful though that the incontinence played a major role. For me, it started almost 10 years ago in my mid 30s and being a a macho profession it was very hard to adjust to. It was hard enough so that by the time I was ready to start moving on and getting my life back, a lot of the habits I had developed being closed off about it were very ingrained. This forum was awesome and helped me so much but it could only get me so far. As most of the older members here remember, I was not a fan in the least of the people that "sit at the other side of our table" (the fetish people) and I found myself filled with a lot of hate and resentment. As a mod here, it got to the point that every new person the joined was one of them till they proved otherwise. It got to be very taxing, at least in my mind, seeing them everywhere I looked. That is probably the main reason I had to step away from the forum here. I needed to not feel that as a mod, I needed to keep everyone safe so they did not have the same experience I had in the very beginning. I needed to go somewhere else where I could let my guard down and learn more about the side I had demonized for so long.
Again, because of the rules here, I don't want to talk more about that side in open forum but if anyone wants to PM me, you are more then welcome. As for what else had me so down, it was a lot of self hate and depression, some of which may have been due to a bad therapist I had that was pushing me to do something that wasn't me.

Your posts have been a valuable corrective for me. I tend to blunder through life, and dealing with incontinence is just another part of my daily routine. I too easily forget that it can be genuinely threatening to many folks. A close friend just returned from an extended hospitalization for urological surgery. I suspect, without any evidence so far, that he too may be just starting to have to deal with incontinence.

Being incontinent isn’t easy.... It’s usually a pain in many, many ways. The challenges never end and on the really bad days, it’s SO very uncomfortable and exhausting dealing with it.
I have bouts of depression that sometimes drags me to the pits of sadness, hopelessness, self pity.... My choice for only lite antidepressants help a lot but honestly it’s my family that usually pulls me back up.
My guess is that many here developed health and incontinence issues along life’s path. I have been incontinent all my life to some degree, and is getting worse with every passing year. My bladder deformities pretty much seal my fate.
My crappy childhood, mostly due to having to wear diapers, has in many ways forged the emotional issues I deal with today. There’s no escaping your past.
To add to my challenges, like I didn’t have enough, I have a staff infection now and have had to use a catheter for several days. I HATE them!!! I can’t sleep. I can’t take care of my family! I can’t function! The antibiotics and creams are beginning to work, thank you God!!
Yes, I’m depressed.

On good days, I too often forget that others are having bad days. Depression, a UTI, and incontinence can combine to make life miserable indeed. And bad days are waiting patiently in the future for all of us. I need you and Rope to keep me stable and attentive and my priorities straight. Thank you.

Rope

I'm so glad that you are doing better and posting here again.
I've been hoping that you were doing good.
This place just hasn't been the same with you not being here.

Having incontinence can, and probably will be, a royal pain in the ass.
With everything that we go through on a normal bases, having incontinence is like having a monkey wrench thrown at us from left field.
So we have to learn to deal with a new disability, that's embarrassing to have.
We now have to plan on every trip we take, if we have the proper protection and if we need supplies while we are away from home.
Not counting the fact that we worry about someone smelling our wet/soiled protection.

Yes, it can be a real pain in the ass, but we each have the ability to learn how to cope with it and how to protect ourselves.
Finding that perfect protection is a trial and error process that seams like it never ends.
We can get used to a specific product that seams to work real good, then the manufacturer changes it "for the new improved" model.
LOL it seams like whenever a company changes something to "new and improved" it just means that it might not work as good.
Like laundry soap, "new and improved" means its in a smaller container and costs more.
With protection, it means that we might have to start looking for something new.

Just remember, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
There are about 13 million other people that also have to deal with incontinence. And that's just in the USA.
That's a LOT of products being sold just for dealing with incontinence.


On the other hand, we can go to the movies and watch the entire movie without having to run to the bathroom ROFL

Ok, it's WAY past my bedtime and my pillow is hollering for me HEHE

Schoppy, I agree planning for a trip is painful all by itself. I panic every time there is a possibility of a coworker having to go with me. Plus, the full size suitcase you have to lug around when you could possible get away with a small carry on for a couple of days away from home. Plus the feeling of having to hide everything from everybody is a pain in the #&^. I'm sure most people would just say go to the bathroom more often. If only it was that simple. They don't realize you could go and 5 minutes later your going again.

Anyways, it sucks in every aspect, but learning to live with it has become part of life. I have my bad days and my good days. Some days I just say @#&%^ I don't care who sees or who knows, its a disability and then there are the other days I don't want to leave the house as my depression/anxiety has kicked in. Overall, I have discovered over many years with my conditions and seeing others having a mental breakdown in the military, mental health is just has important as treating a compound fracture. It just sucks that most people think having a mental issue means you are crazy. To those who step forward and say I have an issue are brave. I just wished all disabilities were looked at in the same way, it is a disability.