www.incontinentsupport.org

Hi everybody,

I'm new here so I guess I'll relate my story as to how I came here.

So, I wet the bed until I was 6 or 7. After many trips to the doctor we were told I just didn't realize I had to go until it was too late. Day and night. As was normal with this back in the 70's she threatened to put me back in diapers. I don't think it was the threat but about the same time things got better. I've always wondered "what if". How would life have been?

Fast forward to later life. In my late 30's my wife filed for divorce. Ended up very contested. My oldest daughter apparently learned from someone in school how to play one parent against the other and did it very well, which my ex wife eventually took full advantage of. Plus, me being a guy, the judge hated me, because this poor woman who cheated on me was the victim. But enough history. Just enough to make my point.

About 4 1/2 years ago, I started having occasional bedwetting incidents. It took one time to "ring my bell". Twice to get me to go buy a package of Depends. I only started with them because they were readily available.

Well, the incidents were only about once every couple weeks.....then once a week.....you know this story. I have no doubt that the stress of the divorce was really starting to wear me down. Everything I find says stress doesn't cause incontinence. I don't believe it.

About this time, I moved to northern Minnesota, near the border. Love it here! The isolation, winters, everything! Wide open spaces.

In the past few years, my night time problem came and went on no predictable schedule, except that I absolutely would be getting up 3, 4, 5 times per night. Sometimes I didn't make it in time, sometimes I didn't even wake up until morning.....in a wet bed again. Back to using what diapers I had left and I got serious about ordering more. I put window weatherizing plastic between my bedding and mattress. Noisy but it works and you get used to it.

Spring of 2016 I went to the doctor and had tests done for bladder abnormalities and prostate issues. All negative.

Summer of 2016 I started having problems with my left hip. Then my left knee. Then my left foot. Little by little, my left side was going numb. Next it was my left hand. Numb, then it felt like it was on fire. Then my left shoulder hurt. Anybody see a pattern here with regards to the left side?

I went to the doctor and they did MRI's on both my brain and brain stem. A few days later they called me to come in for more (4) on my brain stem. That suggests they found something. Neurologist said they thought they did but then they couldn't find it. He told me there is nothing wrong with me. I think that's because his ego wouldn't let him say the words....."I don't know". I know how I was feeling.....there was something wrong. But it went away on its own. I have a hunch that I could have the beginnings of MS. Symptoms (haven't even mentioned all of them) are right and it can go into remission. But it comes back to visit once in awhile. We'll see. In the meantime, I'll deal with the incontinence the best way I can. That's with diapers, yes I used the d-word. I'm politically incorrect.

They never continued with an MRI of my lower spine.....but I wonder....

So, all that being said, I take it a day at a time, stay optimistic and know full well the numbness could could come back any time.....even worse. But I've always been a person that would accept pretty quickly what happens in life. What are you going to do, wallow in self pity? Move on. MS wouldn't necessarily mean my life is over, just that it would be different.....and more difficult
And the diapers? Just recently I've had to go 24/7, except around the house, but even then, most of the time I'm wearing one, so I'm not running for the toilet every 20 minutes. I've accepted it, I feel comfortable and confident. I can do anything I usually do and I get a whole night of uninterrupted sleep for a change! How awesome is that?

So far, it's primarily only UI, but I'm not going to say fecal incontinence has never happened. Probably 6 or 8 times in 20 years.....or 4 or 6 times in 5 years. See where this looks like it's going? I've sort of dreaded the day it becomes fecal also, but the last two times it's happened (past couple months), I had used a barrier creme and clean up was much better and easier. Again.....accept it all in stride. If that's what I am dealt I'll deal with it.

But, I wait and wonder where this is going.

One thing I wonder about and can't find any real data on. Is there any connection between child bedwetting and incontinence later in life? I cannot help but think that there is.

In closing, I think we end up with diapers as being a choice in our lives. I say that and realize the statement requires qualification. My choice became waking up in a wet bed and nowhere I could go or wearing a diaper. I chose diapers and I'm happy with it. A normal life.....with a twist.

Sorry it was so long but I think every intro will be.

Thanks and I look forward to being a part of this community

Welcome to the forum! I too, am pretty new here, but I've found some great information and gotten some fantastic support!

[quote]One thing I wonder about and can't find any real data on. Is there any connection between child bedwetting and incontinence later in life? I cannot help but think that there is.

I, too, wonder what the connection is between childhood bedwetting and its recurrence as an adult. I wet the bed until I was 9 or 10, and now as I approach 50, I am dealing with it again, as well as daytime incontinence. I have found several online sources that cite a study showing that if your parents wet the bed, you will be more likely to wet the bed. Have not been able to find any info on childhood increasing your chances of adult bedwetting. When I brought this up to my urologist, he didn't give it much credence until I told him both my brother and sister had various wetting issues as kids. This prompted an order for a CT scan.

I actually have found several sources that cite stress/anxiety as a contributing factor to bedwetting - it's the internet, but some are legit sites. Keep searching for a diagnosis - my doc was really perplexed until he did a scope and realized that I was retaining 400-500 cc in my bladder. It was a "eureka" type moment.

Anyway, good luck with your issues, and welcome to the forum.

_________________
"When you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness. So I got that goin' for me, which is nice."

Hey, great story! I really do feel for you. Just a moment ago I have replied in another thread about how lucky I really am to have a supportive wife and the great one, that I can talk honestly and openly about issues, while some people like you - don't have this luck and they are getting married to a swine, that is cheating on you then taking your money and kids away. It has happened to many guys, you can read their stories on certain websites - dedicated to this - maybe you will find some comfort in it, even though some time has passed already I know exactly well, that stuff like this can just bother your for decades, sometimes more and sometimes less. We men, gotta be really careful about who we really marry to as world we live in at the moment isn't best suited for men and is much supportive towards women in any case similar to divorce.

Add my welcome to those above. There is a list of other tests for urinary and fecal incontinence; if your medical insurance will cover them, and if your doctors agree that one or more of them might yield useful information, go for it. Meanwhile, feel free to use us here for the support you have been unable to find elsewhere. On one hand I envy you for where you have chosen to live; my family and doctors would veto such a move.

Due North asks whether there is an association between childhood bedwetting and adult incontinence. Because the urologists that I’ve seen about my severe urge urinary incontinence have never been able to explain exactly what my problem is, I’ve been interested in the medical studies of adult incontinence; and I’ve done a fair amount of reading on the subject.

First, there have been a number of studies showing that childhood bedwetting is associated with adult bedwetting. Some people never “outgrow” bedwetting and continue to deal with it throughout their lives. However, there is also an association between childhood bedwetting and bedwetting that starts up again in adulthood after years or decades of nighttime dryness.

Second, there have been an handful of studies showing that childhood bedwetting is associated with the development adult daytime incontinence in women. But I have not been able to find any studies about whether daytime incontinence among adult men is related to childhood bedwetting.