www.incontinentsupport.org

My urge incontinence has good and bad days. I've noticed that I can hold it in longer on some days and not as long on others. Yesterday, I was at the local grocery store and I felt the urge. I knew I didn't have much time so I immediately dropped what I was doing, left my grocery cart and briskly walked to the restroom. I was confident that I could make it. The bathroom stalls were both empty which is never the case. I thought this would be a good sign. I had a blouse on so it wouldn't be long before I would have a successful trip to the bathroom. I untape one tab and the urge immediately becomes intolerable and I loose control. At that point, there is no point in undoing the rest of the tapes. So close yet so far.

If I could have held it for several seconds longer, I would have made it. Do any of have tips for holding it in a little longer?

thanks kindly
Dianne

Unfortunately, not really. There is a real psychosomatic event called “key in door” syndrome in which your body thinks you have achieved your goal and then gives in. It is possible your body assumed you reached your destination and gave up the “hold.”

This exact scenario has happened to me many times where I am literally unbuckling my pants and the bladder releases.

When you approach the point of "must go now," it is better to go ahead and void in your diaper rather than risk wetting your outer clothing in trying to remove the diaper and not being able to do so before voiding.

Do an online search for urination "triggers." They are very common and range from hearing or seeing running water to the "key in door" trigger that Tarlton mentioned. For example, I realized that whenever I helped my wife by doing the dishes I began peeing (and no, I did not get out of having to do the dishes).

--John
(double incontinent)

I have learned the hard way that its easier to just "let go" when such things happen. That's why I am always wearing a diaper. I just use it and move on. Changing can be done on a more sedate schedule.

_________________
- Tom

If I really think I have a chance of making it then I will make an effort to reach the bathroom. But if I know I cannot or it would be a lot of trouble to try to get to one... I have a diaper for a reason. At least when I have an urge. If I just normally have to pee then I will make an effort to hold it until I can reach a bathroom.

Likewise. There is a reason why I wear what I wear; so that I don't worry about having to "making it"! I used to be a bathroom location slave. But then I threw in the proverbial towel on just "trying to make it". Whew! It's quite a stress reliever not having to worry about bathroom locations, clothing hinderances (like when you can't undo things fast enough), etc. I live free now. And sleep well too!

Oh my gosh ... I tried that excuse on my wife. Lets just say I love our dishwashing machine!

Although I make an effort to use the bathroom as often as necessary, I rarely feel my leakage until I feel it on my skin. Using the bathroom does prolong the time between washing and changing, but it is not a cure.

Hi Dianne,

To answer your question... there isnt really a way to make you hold an extra few seconds. Sometimes you just have to bring the bathroom to you.

Sudden urges can happen at any time and any place. While I use the restroom whenever one is available in order to reduce the number of accidents and the frequency of diaper changes, my urge incontinence is such that I can't "hold it" for very long, sometimes just a couple of minutes, if even that long. If an accident starts, I'm unable to stop the flow and a full void results. Since my accidents are so heavy, I wear high-capacity diapers (usually the NorthShore MegaMax). They work great, and I've never experienced a leak or press-out.

But, I've experienced cases where I didn't feel an urge, but decided to use the restroom because it was available, with the hope of avoiding an accident later on. But, as I walked in to the stall, I would start having an accident in my diaper. Since I can't stop the flow after it starts, I would wait for it to end and then change my diaper. (I always carry my diaper bag into the restroom, just in case.)

Best advice is, if a void starts in the diaper, allow it to finish in the diaper before changing. Even if you can stop the void temporarily, it might unexpectedly resume while removing the diaper to change or to finish in the toilet.