www.incontinentsupport.org

When, and how did anyone finally give in to the need to wear diapers? I have had a long history of poor bladder control, and since my prostatectomy nearly 2 years ago I still have incontinence issues. I have tried, although only at home, to try and wear conventional briefs, but usually without success. I can go several days and nights being dry, and I think I'm finally getting ahead of this issue. However, those days are few. Is it time to give in? I am 71 years old. Is age a factor? How do others cope with the inconsistent/unpredictable problems associated with incontinence?

Probably because of my medical history, I never experienced regret at having to use diapers. I embraced them because they gave/give me freedom to go about my life with minimal disruption. Prior to my sphincterotomy, my bladder was pumping urine back up into my kidneys; the surgery which solved that problem made diapers a daily necessity for the rest of my life. More recently, I developed GI paralysis, which also has made diapers necessary. I could wish my medical situation were different; however, I know that is a fantasy, so I wear protection and get on with the business of living.

dp66:
Early on I tried to second guess my incontinence and wear protection only when I thought I might need it. I soon learned that the anxiety about having a serious leak was far worse than just wearing the appropriate protection full time. As my incontinence and frequency have gotten worse I now wear diapers 24/7 and much to my surprise, and with a good bit of pre-planning, having to wear "different" underwear than most just isn't that big of an issue. Yes, there are still a few challenges involved but in my opinion the reduction of anxiety is well worth having to wear protection full time.

After my nighttime accidents became more frequent, I started wearing diapers to bed. This was actually pretty easy for me, as it beat waking up in a wet bed and ultimately resulted in much better sleep. Making the leap to wearing diapers 24-7 was different, though not necessarily hard. When I started having random leaks or floods, it became necessary to wear protection, and I realized the fear of a huge wet spot down the front of my pants (especially if it happened in front of an audience while teaching/speaking) was worse than my fear of being "found out" wearing a diaper. Once I realized that no one notices (and if they do, they don't say anything) it became easy for me.


I talked in another thread about when I was standing in the hall talking to my boss when I had a flood and leaked down the front of my khakis (while wearing a lightweight diaper). This was the rude awakening I needed to commit to ensuring I was over-protected instead of under.

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"When you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness. So I got that goin' for me, which is nice."

After my prostatectomy at age 60, I struggled for some time attempting to regain continence. This meant kegels and using pads. Often, I found myself racing to the bathroom to avoid a flood and I wet my pants a few times. I still had a bag of Depends pullups and tried those one day and realized that I had a lot less to worry about if I wore pullups and diapers. Plus, I was obviously more incontinent than I really had admitted to myself. I've been padded 24/7 ever since and have no regrets. This isn't a failure but is just living with reality so I can enjoy the rest that life has to offer.

Amen. Was your physician accepting your decision to use pullups 24/7? Was this even discussed with them? Had they suggested this may be helpful even earlier, while attempting kegels or other treatments? If so, would that have helped convince you earlier to use pullups as management tool to be less anxious and more active?

Mine was around 12 years old. Before I was in poor quality pampers at night and pullups in the day until it got so worse and then my parents took me to so many check ups and then we gave in and I wore proper youth and adult nappies since. Even at 24/25, it still is a hassle.

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Incontinent since young, wearing Abena M4 or Tena Slip Maxi.