www.incontinentsupport.org

I started a new post to answer a question Sandy asked me and then find out what others have either given up or changed because of their incontinence.

I earlier stated that so far the main thing that my incontinence has hampered was the prison ministry I work with.

Sandy - I am part of the Kairos Prison Ministry. This ministry is not just a one or two hour visits to the prison. There is a team of about 40 to 50 men for a male prison or women for a women's prison, that go through 32 to 40 hours of support/training meetings to get everyone ready to go into the prison. We spend a complete weekend at the prison working with about 42 inmates for the weekend. We in the prison with these inmates for about 6hrs Thursday, 12hrs Friday and Saturday and 6hrs Sunday, give or take depending on how much time the prison gives us. We stay with the inmates the whole time; we even have a team of cooks that prepare food for them and us so we eat together and are always with them the whole time.

Sandy, my incontinence has slowed me down with this because it is hard to take changes of diapers in with you and discreetly find a place to change without everyone knowing. Last fall I was able to do this because my job allowed me to go in and out of the prison as needed to get supplies and anything else needed that the prison would allow in. I had to first talk to the Chaplain whom works with us on getting our supplies in so that I could carry a change in with me. The chaplain had to let the officers know at the pat down area that I was wearing and would be have a change in my bag. So every time in we were patted down and my bad was opened and checked. The officers were good about it but it was still very nerve racking for me. The next time I work one of these weekends, I know I won't have the luxury of being able to leave the prison during the day. I will have to be right in with everyone at all times.

Yes Kent I can see where that could be a problem Have you asked Jesus to point you in a different direction. Why don't you ask him to direct you on a different path. Ask him to show you a new way also don't look at your condition as a curse look at it as a blessing

What's that did she say a blessing

Yes that's right Doesn't gods word say to give praise in all things No where does it say only in what we think as good. Remember what Job went through Even his wife said Curse God and Die But he stayed the course and never wavered.

Bleed the Blood of Jesus over your situation and yourself Cleanse yourself in his redeeming power. Ask him for a revelation on your situation it may not happen over night or maybe it will Theres a good chance that if you continue in asking him something will open up. It may not be what you were thinking of. But he knows our needs even before we ask.

Lords blessings on you Kent I'll be Praying for you!.............Sandy

Sandy,
I have counted this as a blessing and not a curse. It’s only because of Jesus that I am here and still doing what I can. He put me in this ministry for a reason and now I just have to rely on HIM to help me cope with how to handle the worldly problem of incontinence so I can continue doing his work.

After writing the reply last night, I got to thinking more and more. If the door was open last time and the only thing that was bothered was my pride and He showed me that as long as I trusted Him, nothing went wrong. So I am going to have a talk with a close friend that is in this ministry with me and bounce some things off of him. This is going to be a big step for me because I haven’t talked with anyone that knows me about my incontinence.

Depending on how my body continues to react, there is a chance I may not have to worry about diapers but catheterization. Last night I thought that if my bladder starts back to where I don’t need to cath, I might just talk with my doctor and see about using a Foley and leg bag for the weekends I am to work.

Thank you Sandy so much. You are a big help.
I have been keeping up with your post on Jane and her family, thanking God that your able to be there and be a friend when she really needs one. You are a God send to her and so many others like myself on this board.

Thank you so very much!!!!
Kent

K.T.
That is a tough situation. I admire you for your work there. Where there is a will, there is a way. Sounds like you're on track to get something worked out. Good luck, and you're in my prayers too! ...........Paul Martin

I have contacted one of the guys that does prison ministry with me and asked if he had some night free that we could talk. He left me a message saying that he was thinking about me and would love to talk one night. I haven't gotten any further though. Yes I am working on a plan, but mentally I am having problems with trying to talk with someone that knows me. I will meet with him hopefully this week so I ask that you pray I am able to handle this.

Thanks again for sharing your knowledge and support.

Kent

So far I have not talked with my friend. Every time I think about it, I start getting down and really scared. I am praying that I can overcome this quickly so that I can keep moving on.

I've always wanted to engage in boating and water sports but can not figure a way to manage diapers that I don't want to disclose to boating friends-hardly anyone knows I wear diapers and I'd prefer to keep my problem private.

The best I've managed was to own an 18' sail boat with a tiny but private cabin where I could change into a diaper after being in the water. It was easily handled by one person as well, and when alone I didn't even worry about leaking in my own boat, the cockpit was all fiberglass and water (and anything else) drained readily thru the transom as sail boats easily take on water during some maneouvers.

When I go on a power boat with friends (there is no privacy in a 20' boat), I remain diapered and out of the water while I watch the others ski and wish I could "try that" but I don't wish to leak more than lake water in their boat or on the boats soft seats, when I am back in the boat.

JoeK

Since my incontinence has gotten worse, I too have stayed away from any and all water activities. Do miss them, but for now I can live with not doing some of them.

Update: I have talked to one of my friends that is in prison ministries with me. I explained what was going on and how it made me feel. His words of wisdom has helped me and this afternoon, I will be talking with the leader of the next weekend to see what arrangements can be done so that I can continue in what I was called for. It was nerve racking talking to my friend about incontinence since I haven't been able to talk with anyone live about it. I am having butterflies thinking about the meeting this afternoon.

In my mind, the less people that know, the safer I feel. I guess societies way of thinking that protection (diapers) are for babies of the very old bothers me since I am neither of the two. This bothers me so much that last week, I sent an email off to Rite-Aid because their add listed incontinence supplies, wheelchairs, Ensure, and blood pressure machines under the heading of Senior Health. For some reason that made me so upset that I just wrote them and told them what I thought.

Just wanted to give an update.
I have been really stressed out about having to talk with others about my incontinence. Because of the support here, I have been able to explain to two leaders of the Prison Ministry that I work with about what was going on. Both were very supportive and said that they would work out any arrangements needed so that I can still be a part of the team and help out during the whole weekend at the prison. Saturday, I went to a monthly prayer and share time at the prison. The Chaplain was there and we were able to talk and discuss how things would be handled with me bringing supplies into the prison with me. The Chaplain said not to worry about anything that I wouldn't have any problems and if I did to let them know so that it would be taken care of right away. Knowing this has really helped me a lot. Ever since November Last Year, I have been hiding and not dealing with what I should. This is one ministry that is on my heart and I am so happy that God is working everything out so that I can still share in it. I thank God for everyone’s support here. You all are a true blessing.

Sorry that this is so long and it has taken so long to follow-up on this.

I think that's great news. The easy thing would have been to quit the ministry. Instead you chose to be open and can continue doing what you love.

It's amazing how understanding people can be sometimes. I think this story is inspiring, and hope that other people will take it to heart and not let incontinence get in their way.