www.incontinentsupport.org

Hi all,
I'm travelling back to France in September. My brother in law has a lot of health problems and I'm taking him on a religious pilgrimage to Lourdes where he's seeking healing. I told him about my need for a night time time diaper and his response was "Already?" (i'm only 48 yrs old). What will be interesting is that he has to urinate frequently throughout the day and gets up several times at night due to his enlarged prostate. We were going to rent a car for a chunk of the trip and he was quite worried about finding bathrooms when he needs one. Consequently he was quite happy when I modified the trip by changing target cities and traveling solely by trains which have plenty of restrooms. He will struggle in Paris and other cities as public restrooms are not common at all and you have to be a paying customer to use a restaurant bathroom (note: buying a coffee is enough to be a customer). Many public bathrooms do require payment to the cleaning lady (1-1.5 euro) and porta potties are a rarity in Paris and almost unheard of in the smaller cities. I'm wondering if he might benefit from a protective garment as well.

G

Enlarged prostrate, multiple bathroom trips day and night, and traveling vs potty availability. Yeah it sounds like he is pretty close to needing a diaper. The only thing he's missing is ever having accidents. Once that starts to happen then he will definitely be needing them.

Maybe this can be of any use?
https://www.easycomforts.com/buy-portable-urinal-315545
https://www.amazon.com/Urinal-Bottle-10 ... B00E8D4OSO

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I want to join the bowel movement....

Thanks optimist. I've sent the links to him.

i decided not to send him optimist's links after all although I thank you for them optimist. The bottles would be great if traveling by car but we ditched those plans in favor of trains. Wherever we are otherwise (walking in Paris, walking in small towns, etc), using a bottle is just as problematic as peeing in public.

Below though is the text of my msgs to my brother in law. perhaps someone might my thoughts useful.

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Hey bro,
I wanted to discuss a sensitive topic with you in the hope of avoiding potentially embarrassing situations and that topic is restrooms. A couple considerations:

- train stations (large ones at least) and trains have restrooms. No concerns there although you may need to pay 1/2-1 euro to use the restrooms at a train station
- the plane will have maybe 8 restrooms (I'm guessing) for 300 or so passengers. You've got 8-9 hours flying time.
- small shops/stores do NOT have public restrooms
- malls have public restrooms but I only know the location of 1 mall in Paris (near the Eiffel Tower)
- restaurants do have restrooms but for customers only.
- Buying even a coffee does make you a customer.
- In a small restaurant the restroom is likely small and might only have 1-2 toilets. There may or may not be separate restrooms for men and women. Therefor you may not be able to immediately go if we're at a small but busy restaurant
- Paris has some public porta potties (40-50 cent charge?) and a few public urinals but not a lot
- small towns (Lisieux, Nevers) are very unlikely to have porta potties
- most businesses close from 12-2 for lunch and most everything except restaurants closes by 9 at night. Many businesses are closed on Sundays (Sunday closing laws are changing though)

My overall point is that if you struggle with having immediate and intense urges to use the can, I can't guarentee you instant access to a bathroom. Depending on where we are and the time of day, we may have to search a bit before finding an available toilet. Also the time change may affect your bladder more than you realize. Say hypothetically you tend to go more often in the a.m. In France that urge will hit you in the late afternoon or evening since France is 7 hrs ahead of us. Think about your bladder habits and expect the time of those habits to change by 7 hours. I had problems at nighttime in France because my body thought it was daytime and was still producing daytime amounts of urine. it takes a little time for your body to adjust to the time change.

I'm suggesting that you consider bringing a few Depends with you just in case. If you don't need them, toss them. if you think you might have a problem in a given situation, you have them. As I told you previously, I myself need such products at night. When I was in Europe with my daughter, I was having daytime issues at the time as well as nighttime so Depends was a godsend. When I was in France with my wife I didn't have the products with me and I remember roaming Bayeaux around New Years when everything was closed, I couldn't find a bathroom, and I had to discretely pee against a side of a building. This time I'll be bringing what I need for nighttime in my suitcase and I'll stop at a French pharmacy without hesitation if I need more.

Lastly if you might only leak a little when trying to find a bathroom I have some wonderful mens guards you can use. i don't need them right now as I haven't had daytime issues too often for quite a while.
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Hi Bro,
I had another thought. It's probably been a few years since you've flown anywhere so let me remind you that we could experience turbulence and if severe you might not be allowed out of your seat at a time you need to go. You should anticipate your reaction to the bounciness of turbulence as well as the flight attendants not allowing you up if you need to go.

G,

You're a good brother. And a smart one. I hope he takes your advice to heart. I know how unfortunate it would be to try and help him only to have him have an accident in public. You're very compassionate and I truly hope he listens. I'm sure you never expected you or your brother to be diapered up but such is the life. lol.

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I decided I didn't need a signature

hi all,
Just replying to this old thread. My brother-in-law is a man of few words but I've gathering from him that he's not planning to bring any protection along with. So I'll just be hoping for the best.

Recently he, his daughter, and my daughter drove to the National Square Dance convention and back. On the way home he drove 6 hours without stopping. He doesn't know why or how but he and his daughter were amazed at how long he held it. Daughter things it because he stayed sitting and wasn't drinking anything. So it's apparent that he can hold if he puts his mind to it.

I'm still debating my protection, at least on the plane. I usually don't fall asleep on a plane (too exited) but I might still wear something in case I do. Nighttime wetting is sporadic for me so I'm thinking of bringing diapers along but taking a wait and see approach about wearing them. Se how I feel, how much wine did I drink, etc.

G