www.incontinentsupport.org

Hi! I'm a student, so during any vacations I usually travel back to my hometown and stay with my parents there. Now, last summer my incon wasn't that bad as it is now, but I still felt like I was barely able to hide it from my mom, stepdad and two younger siblings. I was mainly bedwetting and I could get away with only a pullup during daytime, but I still worried that someone, especially my nosey stepdad, would find used diapers in the trash outside (I threw them away at night, since my bedroom is right next to the garage where the bins are).

Now, summer is still a few months away, but I keep worrying about how I should handle this. I feel like I should just be able to tell all this to my mom and not worry about her finding out by herself, but something inside me is just not able to. I know she would be supportive, she always is, but I fear that this would be "too much" for her to handle, since I feel like my ptsd is already taking a toll on her. I didn't even tell her about that myself, my gf did. I don't really want to do that to her, but is it any better hiding it? I certainly isn't going to help my anxiety much.

I don't know what to do Any suggestions?

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Edit:
I should also mention that I was able to successfully hide it during xmas break, but that was only for a week and a half. Summer break lasts 2-3 months...

I personally wouldn't tell them and I would try and keep everything as discreet as possible. If they find out I would act like it's no big deal and something I would like to be kept private because it's personal.

If you're planning on living with them for the summer for that length of time, I definitely would talk to AT LEAST your mother about it. If she is as supportive as you say she is, give her a chance. I speak for many others here when I say that being open and honest with loved ones is one of the best things you can do. The relief you'll experience by being upfront with them is a wonderful feeling, it will feel like a huge weight is lifted from you. This is hard to hide for a long length of time. Most of the people that know about my problems have been very "matter of fact" about it and it has been no big deal. I strongly recommend talking to your mother about it sooner rather than later. I would also add that you are dealing with it appropriately and that she need not worry about you and this condition. Assure her that you've been to a doctor and been given a clean bill of health. (Assuming you have, in fact been to a doctor)
Best of luck, please let us know what you decide to do and how you make out.

Thanks! I guess that's what I wanted to hear. I have been to a doctor, yes, I'm not that reckless! I'll let you guys know when I decide. Spring break is coming up soon as well, so that might be a good time to tell her. Phew... That's going to be hard..

I also second telling them, especially since you will be living with them for so long. Just make sure you be honest and up front. Let them all know how stressful this is for you, and how much you're worrying about how they may react. Be there to answer any questions they may have too. And most importantly, try not to worry about it too much.

I agree, telling them just enough to ease their minds. My guess is they've noticed something, so assuring them you've got it under control will go a long way. Plus, they wont be worried when you add a fitted sheet to the mattress to protect the bed. Another point, this might even make them afford you MORE privacy!

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When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.

Marcus Aurelius

Let us know how it goes. I had to tell my parents because I needed help buying diapers (my insurance company doesn't cover them). My parents mostly felt sorry for me. There was no judgement or making me feel bad. Just concern. They have been supportive since all of this started.