www.incontinentsupport.org

If you've followed my bedwetting thread, you know where this started.

I have to say that I'm pretty freaked out... so I guess it's time to come clean in hopes of finding some support...

A few months ago I thought I was noticing that trips to the bathroom were happening more frequently than normal, but I wrote it off to hypersensitivity from the bedwetting...

A few weeks later I thought I noticed that I was going from nothing to "OMG, I have to go now!" reaally quick. Again I called myself a hypochondriac.

About two months ago my wife and I were sitting playing cards, and I lost control. I'm not talking about a little leak.

I swore her to secrecy and pretended it didn't happen, but it did... and I knew it. I started going to the bathroom every hour. I actually set a timer. I work from home most days, but if I have to go in to the office or to a customer's site, I cut fluids 2 hours prior and won't eat/drink again until I return home, even if that's 6/7 hours. This can't be healthy.

WTF do I do now? I'm 40, for God's sake!

Hey Tim, I can relate, but mine started after an MVA with the urgency, then the nighttime incidents. There is a great thread on here if you look for it titled "Diapers or dehydration" it is an eye opener in regards to the latter, I am a master at fluid juggling by now. Daytime I have to watch what I take in, I don't worry so much about it at night, just "dress appropriately" for it and try not to lose any sleep over it all. Can be a challenge to say the least during the day, and I time my trips as well so I avoid the inevitable rush to the bathroom that is sure to hit at the most inopportune moment. It is certainly not at all healthy to cut out fluids entirely, but a 300 ml bottle of water spread out over 4-6 hours wouldn't hurt, and will definitely aide with the proper functioning of your body, but it is a tough balancing act for those of us with Urge issues. I too am in my 40's, so don't think you are the only one out there! You talk to your doc at all about this yet? Puffy

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Puffy
BC, Canada
Fighting the "Bladder Battle" since 1995

I second Puff's advice. I advise you to speak to your doctor about this. There may be a simple cure.

Take Don's advice first to see if it is something to be remidied. If it can not, you will find wearing diapers to be a lot easier than the rigid schedule you are trying to keep. Wearing diapers is not really such a big deal. Admittedly of course I may over simplify it as I have worn them all of my life.

I had an appointment with my doc last week. He's scheduled more testing after the holidays and has me taking Enablex, but so far it doesn't seem to be doing much other than giving me the worst dry mouth I've ever experienced. (I've often rolled my eyes at that "side effect" when it comes up on the radio, but now... yeah, I can sympathize)

I've been wearing "protection" around the clock for a few weeks now. With my "scheduled" trips to the bathroom, I've had very few accidents, so usually I get through a day without having to change. I'm worried about people noticing, but I'm a LOT more worried about what happens if I do have an accident without protection... So diapers it is...

The doc, though, doesn't like my scheduled trips because he's concerned I'll lose bladder capacity. He also lectured me about cutting back on fluids. He wants me drinking more water and trying to hold it for as long as I'm able... Ugh... I fear that...

Yup, been there too, with the appointments you need to arrive at with a full bladder, like that is going to happen. The Ultrasound I had several years ago, I just drank the two glasses while I was driving there, 15 mins before, and I had a short wait as well, but made it with enough in there for them to get the scan they needed to. The Uro knew of my urge problems, so for the Cystoscope appt, he told me not to bother trying, just come empty, for that I breathed a sign of relief! I have not tried any of the meds yet, with all the negative reports of the nasty side effects, most likely I will not go that route... good luck! Let us know the outcome when you get there, Puffy

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Puffy
BC, Canada
Fighting the "Bladder Battle" since 1995

Hi CallMeTim....

You said:

And I have to applaud that decision to take the diapers as the lesser of two evils. You will get used to the fact that people will NOT notice them...and believe me, that is such a worry of everyone who resorts to diapers....and it is a serious enough worry to keep people house bound....afraid to go out....they don't want to have a accident in public and they are afraid to wear a diaper thinking the whole world will know. So they stay in.....and drop out of life.

It's hard to hear us say "no one is going to notice" and believe it....but you are getting there....it will take a little time to really relax and find that no one will know! And you benefit greatly from NOT being stressed out, worrying about a leak and wet pants.....Diapers really do let us be normal! and get on with our life!

JoeK

I am in complete agreement that people will not notice your diapers and I suspect if they do they will either not care or be to embarrased themselfs to say anything.

Over the years, I have gone through periods of wanting to be normal and tried not drinking much liquid to miniminze accidents. NOT a good idea, you can get a bladder infection very easily!

Terry

I so appreciate the support guys. Been a rough few months, though I think the worst of its behind me. Somehow the last meet with the doc kinda brought it to a head in my mind. Thankfully, I have an incredibly amazing and supportive wife. She and I have done a lot of talking, and that's helped tremendously.

As for the applause at accepting diapers... The one thing I do know is that I'll be damned if this is going to ruin my life. Dealing with this problem sure as hell ain't what I had in mind, but I'm definitely going to keep on living. I have great friends and amazing family, all of whom have been supportive. Hopefully we figure out what's going on and fix it, but if not... C'est la vie. Life will go on, and I will enjoy every minute of it...

Good for you!

Terry