www.incontinentsupport.org

Please forgive my absence for the past few weeks. Life has become complicated here; see below.

I have bi-lateral (both inner ears) Meniere's disease. Meniere's is a disease of the balance mechanism(s) of the inner ears. Meniere's is an episodic disease, in which symptoms (nausea, extreme vertigo, tinnitus, hearing deficit) come and go. In my case, an attack can last from a few seconds to six weeks, with symptom-free months in between. One additional symptom of the bi-lateral form of Meniere's is called a Tumarkins attack. When one ear is affected, eventually the good ear can take over, and the patient can recover, albeit with diminished hearing. When both inner ears are affected and attack occurs, there is no backup, and a Tumarkins event occurs. The patient's balance mechanisms both go on strike at the same time, and the patient simply falls to the surface. Unlike an epileptic seizure, there is no aura, no warning; the patient simply collapses.

When I had my Tumarkins attack, my bladder and rectum both erupted, filling my diaper. I was with my family at a fast food restaurant about three hours from home. The attack left me dazed, disoriented, and helpless for the rest of the trip home, but, with the assistance of Nullo and a heavy diaper, nobody guessed my situation, not even my family, who are always concerned for my welfare.

Diaper Lovers (DL) seem eager to use their diapers to cause a scene. I have come to love my diapers (dl) precisely because they helped me avoid causing a scene.

Tumarkins does throw a monkey wrench into my incontinence management. If there are any other Meniere's folks here, I welcome any and all the advice they may offer.

Thanks.

Patrick

Patrick, Glad you are ok and you were around family when this happen. From the sounds of it this disease requires someone to be around you all the time.

I don't have an illness such as yours, but I share your fear about having a bowel accident around my family. Just being in a diaper is uncomfortable enough. I have had an accident at my brothers house and that was humiliating. I'm lucky the rest of his family was not home and he was very understanding and offered me no pity. So far he and my father are the only ones who know about my incontinence and how I deal with it. I know the rest of my family will probably find out eventually and I dread that day. However, I'll just have to deal with it as my bowel problems don't look like they are going away anytime soon. I keep reminding myself many other people have far worse burdens to bear and they make it through life so I can do no less. Many people have posted on this site and advised others not to let their condition affect there lives. For awhile, I didn't want to leave my house, but I realized that is not living. I will live my life to the fullest even if it's in diapers. I'm still coming to terms with accepting my situation, but I will deal with it and move on. I'm glad you were able to keep dignity despite such horrendous circumstances. The longest I've ever had to drive home to change was about an hour. That was miserable. I couldn't imagine sitting in a dirty diaper for three hours with your family no less. I hope I can show the same fortitude as you if I'm ever in a similar situation. That is what my diaper means to me, security. If someone wants to pretend to be incontinent and wear diapers they don't need as some kind of sex game, all I can say is becarful what you wish for. You migh not enjoy your game so much when you can't stop wearing a diaper whenever your not in the mood or it's inconvenient. I'll never be a DL, but I'll be a DW (diaper wearer) as long as I need to and no longer.

Wow, Patrick, that's a rough scene to have to go through. Although I am bowel incontinent and experience some accidents when away from home, nothing on the scale of what you have described. I had not appreciated all that you must go through. I applaud your courage in facing your challenges and getting on with living your life.

--John

Diapersagain, "Amen" to what you have said. Too many incontinents focus only on their medical symptoms or on the hardware, e.g., diapers, catheters, enemas, etc. IMHO, to cope effectively we must move beyond that to focus on our own emotional response to our circumstances (bladder and bowel accidents, etc.), including our acceptance of our own incontinence and how others may perceive or react to it.

It is not the unfortunate and unpleasant circumstance of a public accident that causes us to avoid society and become hermits, it is how we deal with that in our minds. Those who have been able to process all of the factors involved and cope by getting on with a nearly normal life not only have had to become toughened to their realities but are showing grit and courage that most others are unable to appreciate.

--John

If society was not so jacked up about the hole diapered adult thing, life would be a lot easier. I think about it like this.. A baby is not judged becouse he/she needs diapers, yet adults are. If your not two, or ninety two your just weird for wearing diapers. I feel that we as incontence should adopt a child like attitude about are situation. A toddler does not care that they wear diapers, they nearly care once they have used said diaper and it becomes uncomfortable. If our emotional rederic toward are situation was to be that of a toddler we would not fear that the World is judging us for our diapered state.. And if the world learned to mind their own business they would not care about what you wear.

_________________
Life is like a camera
Focus of what is important
Capture the good times
Develop from the negatives
Take another shot!

Sounds awful what you went through. Glad your ok

Keep well,


4wheeldave.

And that begins with our doctors. These clowns feel that they are an absolute failure unless they can get us to endure expensive painful drugs and procedures in the false hope that we will not need our diapers any more. They try to impress that same attitude on us. Well, I have news for my doc- I've tried the surgeries and drugs. The diapers have fewer side effects and cost less- I'm good with that.

_________________
- Tom

I agree the worst thing a diaper will cause is some embarrassment and maybe diaper rash. If a viable cure comes along, just take your diaper off and no side effects. I've been embarrassed when I've had to change in a public restroom and some jackass decides to make some smart ass comment. I always carry my Glock even though I'm not cop anymore. I admitt I fantasize about shooting the jackass, not that I ever would. I have been tempted though. I don't know why people think it's okay to even look at what I wear as underwear let alone comment on it. I mean, few but crudest jerk would walk up to women they didn't know and ask her what her bra size was. Yet I've had people watch me change through the cracks in a stall door. Like I stated in previous post I've had people say some pretty derogatory things and assume I'm either a pervert or mentally incompetent just because I need to wear a diaper. Some days I wish I'd have left my gun at home so I wouldn't have control the temptation to do something really stupid. I guess what I'm trying to say is it's societys attitude about adults wearing a diaper that causes most of us so much stress. Why can't people just mind there own business while I deal with my medical problem. I did have one person tell me he was glad he wasn't the only one. I assume he meant had to wear diapers too. I was so surprised I couldn't think of anything to say before he left. I wish I would have offered him some encouraging words at least. There have been times I've been tempted put off a change after an accident just avoid a public restroom. But I can't stand wearing my filth any longer than I have too. The only I'll wait to change is when it's bad enough the only way I can clean up is with a shower. That is a very long drive home. I just ordered some Devon tonight, hopefully that will help with the odor. I hate knowing other people may have to endure my odor if can't leave the area quickly. I don't like smelling myself so I know nobody else does. Plus it's pretty much a dead give away. I hope it works and helps me be a little more discreet and considerate of others. Even though some people are anything but considere totoward us. Sorry I've posted so much, but it's helping me work through this. I'll quit rambling on for a while.

For odor issues I was advised to take a daily intake of vitimin c this advice sorted the odor issue I had a treat. In the UK we have service stations with showers for truck drivers and on occasions this has been extreamly useful as one can change in privacy and have a full wash if needed. In the UK I have found several marinas/campsites to be most helpful with the use of their facilities and some costal harbours have public shower blocks.

Hope this helps.

Greenbank