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I try not to worry so much...

Wed Dec 04, 2019 1:55 pm

Ever since I became incontinent, I wondered what would happen if people found out about my issue. When I first started using incontinence products, I would hide out in bathrooms to wait until it was empty so no one would hear me changing. It has been said here many times that people are too concerned in their own lives to worry about what kind of underwear people are wearing. This is very true. I stopped caring. I have been incontinent for over 10 years. I suffer from some serious illnesses and just don’t have the time to worry about the negative opinions of others. If someone has a polite question about my disabilities, I would explain and see it as an opportunity to educate. My disorders are rare and many people have never heard of them. I don’t wear onesies or anything like that. My body frequently hurts so I try to be as comfortable as possible. I wear lightweight or dry fit shorts most of the time. I live in Florida where the weather is mostly mild. I don’t go out of my way to be noticeable. I just wear what works. I make sure my clothing is loose fit but I know sometimes there’s an outline of the diapers I wear if someone were to stare at me. I have a therapist to help me with my chronic illness struggles. Sometimes we talk about the incontinence as it occasionally bothers me. She told me that if someone were to notice, what does it matter? It doesn’t. She told me not to concern myself with the opinions of others. They’re none of my business and to do what works for me. She said the majority of the time, if someone were to notice, they would probably just think, “hmm...that guy is wearing a diaper. He must have a medical problem. Oh well, next thought”. Most people have the decency not to say anything. I will say that when wearing these things, at some point, people are bound to notice. You try to alleviate what you can but you can only do so much. At some point, you’ll be outed. Don’t sweat it. Just carry on. Most people just don’t care about such things. My therapist offered some humor. She joked that if anyone had the guts to make a negative comment, sarcastically offer them a diaper and that’ll probably get them to go away. I’ll say that over the years, I’ve had plenty of instances where people have seen waistbands, outlines, and such. It’s not a big deal. I just try to take care of me. I correct myself and move on. I’ve never received a negative comment or overheard anyone talking about me. Like my therapist said, it doesn’t matter.

Re: I try not to worry so much...

Wed Dec 04, 2019 5:39 pm

Neither of us are medical professionals, so we need the advice and guidance of folks trained to understand the complex medical situations we live with daily. Incontinence is a symptom, not a disease. However dealing with it can be difficult, even traumatic for some of us. Your success is both an example and a goal for my own management. Thank you.

Re: I try not to worry so much...

Wed Dec 04, 2019 9:03 pm

Good attitude towards society in general Patrick, I think I posted earlier somewhere that the way I handle my incontinence is quite similar to yours, and I truly believe it´s very good for one´s self steem and of course the social relationships of the individual, in general.

Oh! And a little note: I myself havs done more than once that thing of offering the diaper to a guy who´s being rude or unpolite and I can swear it´s very effective. Later you can´t forget his face when it happened!! Priceless, for real :lol:

best regards to everyone!!
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