Dating and diapers

[justej]

Ok so i was thinking about doing one of those dating sites. How do i tell a potential date that i gave to wear diapers? Do i do it up front? Wait?

ah!

[B Brian]

I say don't let incontinence be one of you defining "traits" you'd list on a dating website. At the most, just add a one-line that you are urinary incontinent, and leave it at that. You don't even need to mention diapers, though if someone asks for more details be honest. Even if they don't ask, I'd make sure to bring it up by the third date at the latest. After all, you don't want to invest too much time with someone who won't be able to accept the full you- faults and all.

[Andy0690]

i agree with brian i am married now and didn't meet her till years after i became incontinent. personally i let it drop while we were still just friends before romantic properties even entered the mix but as for using the site i would probably not say anything on the profile portion but let them know on like the second or third date so there weren't any surprises later on and they didnt feel like was trying to hide something about myself from them.

[matthewmeto]

I fortunately met my current partner before My symptoms worsened. Just be open about it and you will weed out the jerks early on. Don't give too many details in your profile or you may attract the wrong crowd.

[justej]

thanks everyone. i put on there that i had some disabilities. no one has contacted me yet. hah!

[Porkchop]

Like everyone else, I didn't become incontinent until after a few years of marriage so I didn't have that issue... But, I recommend waiting until you've corresponded for awhile or met in person to bring it up. Putting too much on a profile just seems dangerous.... My OPSEC alarms go off and I just couldn't do it.

[Don]

I think I'm with Porkchop. I wouldn't put anything on your profile regarding disabilities. It may scare away potential dates before they even get to meet you. I would advise you meet someone first, get to know them, and sort of gauge the situation to see if it is right to tell them. I think putting that you're incontinent on a profile is not necessary. I think it is detrimental to your cause.

[WetDad]

I haven't been dating in a long time (still happily married BTW), but this is just one of those things that does not define who I am. So why would I tell someone about it so soon in a relationship? It fits into the category of TMI to me. Just like listing my prescriptions.

[justej]

Yea. I didnt straight up put out there. Just that have disabilities (ic being just one of them). I dunno. Maybe this dating thing is a bad idea

[justej]

I say that because I want to be open and upfront yet weed out the creepos. I dont want to be somenes fetish. Its part of my life now and I need someone who wont be a jerk either. Its tough