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How would you answer my wife

Thu Nov 20, 2014 4:12 pm

Been a while since I posted. 46 yr old male, 117 lb soaking wet, still fit boys clothes.

My moderately/slightly enlarged prostate is causing slight overflow incontinence. Used to be worse but I cut back on coffee to 1/2 caff. Often drip after zipping up pants. Wife wants me to wear a pad or brief when wearing dress clothes to church. I usually flick water onto my pants and claim that I spilled but she knows better and she's grossed by the thought of laundering my clothes with other clothes. She's overreacting I know.

What male pads do you think might fit comfortably in small underwear (I'm still in boys sizes)? I've been using thin teen bedwetting pullons but they rip easily due to being a titch too small (they really don't fit up to 125 lb). it doesn't need to be super absorbent as the leaks aren't that bad. i want something thin, something that sticks or stays in place, and something that won't make my front look fat.

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As a side note, I posted a long time ago about hemmoroids, wiping issues, etc. Just letting you know that my roids have abated somewhat after I improvised a squat toilet in our basement. i got the idea off the web and its been great. Pain lessened, less messy, easier cleanup, etc.

Re: How would you answer my wife

Thu Nov 20, 2014 6:46 pm

The Depends for men guards may work. They have adhesive backing and are best worn with snug briefs (the 'tighty-whitey' kind of briefs, not the 'euphemism for diaper' briefs). They will add a bit of bulk up front, but pretty much everything will do that to a degree.

If you're looking for a pull-up, the Depend Real Fit for men are actually quite good for something of lower absorbency. They do combine sizes though, so there's a chance the S/M may be loose.

Re: How would you answer my wife

Thu Nov 20, 2014 9:53 pm

In my opinion and experience, Depend guards are NOT worth it.. I always had problems with them not sticking.. or them bunching up.. or my member ending up underneath the pad..offering no proteciton whatsoever.. so i started wearing undergarments.. the belted shield kind. those worked ok.. but were not comfortable due to the straps bunching up and cutting into my skin.. A pullup may work well for you. but as he pointed out, sizing is an issue. Honestly.. me personally, after trying all the products out there.. pads, undergarments, pullups, briefs..i settled on using tape-on briefs 24/7 due to them providing the fullest range of coverage for all kinds of leaks. The biggest advantage is you don't have to worry at ALL about where your'e pointed and whether you're.. shall we say.. at full attention or not when you leak.. the brief has you covered.. whereas with a pullup.. if you have a random stiffness...sudddenly your'e pointed up where there is little to no padding..and if your incontience is like mine, unpredicitable.. you could find yourself dealing with a leak... depending on the amount of leakage.. it could be a big issue or a small issue. Ok, i know what your'e thinking.. If i wear tape on briefs how do i used the toilet? I personally find it easy to either do a wiggle dance to pull a brief up and down if it has sticky tabs.. or.. I wear a breif that has velco tabs and cloth backing.. those are infintetly refastenable.. and won't leave you with gaps in the crotch like pullups do.. your'e fully covered. if youre not dealing with floods, but only small leaks, then depend proteciton with tabs should do you just fine.. or you might want to try abena clothback in size small..

Hope this helps!

Peace out!

Rob

Re: How would you answer my wife

Thu Nov 20, 2014 10:56 pm

I couldn't wear the guards either, but if all you do is drip a little afterwards they may be what you need. One thing I have learned is to wear cotton underwear over my briefs. This does two things when I do have leaks they help hold the brief in place. Secondly, if the brief starts to leak a little the cotton acts as a little bit of a back up. You can start out with sample packs for free or buy some under $6 at your local drug store so you can see which may work best for you.

Re: How would you answer my wife

Fri Nov 21, 2014 3:16 am

I have used the Depends guards in the past, easy to get, but they are too thin in the front for me, so I went online and ordered the Abena model, have not got them yet, but worth the attempt at the drip issues, and occasional episode of more. Worth a look, I got the level II kind for the extra I need, & will report on them when they arrive, http://agecomfort.com/products/ABENA-ABRI-MAN-MALE-PADS.html 8) Puffy

Re: How would you answer my wife

Fri Nov 21, 2014 7:39 am

Depend now has two different levels of protection in the lines of pads. First is the "guard" which most here now about and may have even tried. The newer one I'd a "shield" which is suppose to be thinner. I had not tried them because by the point they came on the market, I was well past that level of protection.
I am thinking, with your smaller frame, this may work very well for you.

Rope

Re: How would you answer my wife

Fri Nov 21, 2014 11:22 am

Get a small microfiber hand towel and fold it to the size you need for your body and use your underwear to hold it in place. Microfiber can be easily washed and resists stains pretty well. If it's only a few drops at a time than even a guard might be overkill. Sometime the simple options work best.

Re: How would you answer my wife

Fri Nov 21, 2014 1:59 pm

I've ordered a free sample of the male guards and shields from Depend. Should have them in a week. Didn't think of a microfiber towel. i have extra, unneeded towels used for cleaning eyeglasses. Might try those.

Re: How would you answer my wife

Sat Nov 22, 2014 3:47 pm

I have used the Depend guards and did like them. When I need to use a pad however, I do prefer the Tena guards for men. I think they're a little thinner while covering more area. I usually wear them inside a pull-up, either Depend or Tena when I go to work. I don't wear regular diapers at work. Usually I wear regular diapers at home, though they are overkill for my incontinence which tends to be on the lighter side, thankfully....its the urinary frequency that kills me, at 20-25 times per day......

Re: How would you answer my wife

Sat Nov 22, 2014 7:03 pm

My answer woud be to initially accept your wifes point of view as it is so much better if you have her on board. I would wear protection if you can obtain protection such as Attends Slip Active give them a go during the day. I wear them and they are so confortable and discreet under normal underwear (I now wear stretch briefs/pants) and in all the situations I have been in no one has noticed. I hope this helps a bit.
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