www.incontinentsupport.org

Support for dealing with incontinence
It is currently Thu Mar 28, 2024 9:50 am

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 10 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: New to this
PostPosted: Mon Jun 07, 2021 7:04 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Apr 16, 2021 12:50 pm
Posts: 9
I am new to this forum. Please let me express my thanks to all the nice people contributing here and of course the people that run it. Reading through the posts has helped me a great deal. I appreciate it.

Up until a little over a year ago, I experienced no problems whatsoever other than having to get up in the middle of the night to urinate. Over the course of the last 18 months I started feeling urges to urinate but did not think much of it as I was always able to make it to the bathroom. But then one day when I felt another urge, I could not make it to the bathroom and wet myself as my bladder just emptied itself without my being able to control any of it. Fortunately, this happened at home and it looked like it was a one-time thing for the following week or so. I was of course nervous and started making pre-emptive trips to the bathroom when I was out and about only to experience an embarrassing incident at a grocery store checkout line. Fortunately, I was wearing black jeans and thermal underwear. It was all soaked but at least I did not leave a puddle and was able to extract myself without anyone noticing. Fearing future incidents, I then purchased male guards which I found to be completely inadequate for my situation, tried pullups which frequently leaked due to my large voids, tried drug store tab briefs with the same result, and only found some reliability with various premium tab style diapers but still experienced relatively frequent embarrassing leaks. I did not have a good time. Of course I was hoping it would just go away but I eventually had the courage to visit my primary doctor while wearing diapers. I survived. He determined no diabetes and could not really find anything. He referred me to a urologist who put me through a series of tests and has so far also come up empty handed other than a slightly enlarged prostate. I will be heading for a neurologist next.

What is somewhat frustrating to me is that I have a fair amount of bladder control left but now find myself wearing Megamax diapers with a 2XL booster. This is the only protection I have found so far that keeps me leak free and gives me enough confidence so that I can start leading a normal life again. Maybe I will find something lighter that also works for me.

Like many here, I am concerned that friends and family might notice that I currently wear diapers. It does not help that I went from wearing nothing at all to a very bulky combination that anybody who looks would notice. I try to rationalize it or I try not to care but it is affecting me. It should give me comfort that I have never noticed any adult wearing diapers before. However, I could not help but notice when an elderly woman wet herself on an airplane. Wearing effective protection is obviously a better choice.

Like many here, I try to make sure that the diaper does not show when I bend down. When I go out I have so far been wearing long t-shirts that I have been tucking in and an untucked shirt over it. Now that it is almost summer, it is too hot. I recently found these ultra-high rise boxer briefs, that do a perfect job covering the diaper. https://www.amazon.com/Ouruikia-Underwe ... B08HKXT43G. They may be useful to others as well.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: New to this
PostPosted: Tue Jun 08, 2021 8:27 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Mon Jan 25, 2021 2:13 pm
Posts: 455
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada
First of all, welcome to this forum!
Quote:
I was out and about only to experience an embarrassing incident at a grocery store checkout line.

That is how mine started- what a terrible place for a surprise!

It sounds like you've worked out something that works for you. It does get easier to accept with time. I also went from continent for life to incontinent the next day (diabetes nerve damage). Nothing prepares you for that. My voids occur slowly but others here can offer advice for your situation. Hopefully the tests will reveal something treatable. Best of luck!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: New to this
PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2021 3:00 am 
Offline

Joined: Wed Jul 09, 2014 3:46 am
Posts: 374
Location: UK
Hi HDT

Incontinence can be a shock one day normal next day not. This happened to me when I was a teenager so made it harder to cope with but I did. I found a wonderful lady at Boots (pre internet) that was so supportive and helped me a lot. Diapers changed my life yes but allow me to do what any normal person can. Yes I have to do a lot more to look after myself hygiene etc but the rewards outweigh the negatives. If someone can’t cope seeing that I wear diapers it is their problem not mine in fact incontinence shows who your real family and friends are. The lady at Boots gave me the following quote that helped me through early dark days “Yes I have incontinence but incontinence does not have me”

I found this lovely place far too late in life but has been wonderful to connect with fellow people in the same boat as me who fully understand day to day life. I have accepted incontinence however have still down days when things go wrong so having a place to vent in safety is great!

Look after yourself and be kind!

Greenbank


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: New to this
PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2021 5:08 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Apr 16, 2021 12:50 pm
Posts: 9
Thanks for the warm welcome and encouragement. I am currently happy that I have found protection that gives me confidence and I am also starting to get less worried about people noticing. I have not had a leak in over 6 weeks, not even yesterday, when I was held up for several hours past my planned return home. Initially, I thought that wearing a wet diaper for extended periods of time is something I couldn't do. Now I have pretty much stopped going to regular bathrooms because it is difficult to get the booster back in place after I have pulled down the diaper. The booster actually keeps me feeling fairly dry. A return to the gym is next on the agenda.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: New to this
PostPosted: Wed Jun 23, 2021 4:56 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Apr 16, 2021 12:50 pm
Posts: 9
As I am still looking for reliable protection that is less bulky than my current solution, I ordered a sample pack of tabbed diapers from InControl consisting of 1 Essential brief, 1 Inspire Original brief, and 1 Elite Hybrid brief. Both the Elite and the Original kept me leak free. They are fairly wide in the crotch, quite soft and comfortable, and absorb and wick very very quickly. They also feel quite dry. I will order some more and see whether the promising results continue. They are a bit crinkly but otherwise seem to be great.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: New to this
PostPosted: Fri Jun 25, 2021 8:24 am 
Offline

Joined: Sun Oct 20, 2013 3:45 pm
Posts: 1943
Location: North Carolina - Raleigh area
Welcome. We all have been where you are and understand what you are going through.

The Inspire Elites arguably are the best diaper made. That is an excellent choice. I also wear the NorthShore MegaMax that have an excellent absorbent capacity and cost a bit less.

Re boosters, you will need to experiment. Try a smaller booster. It can help to leave space on either side of the booster pad so that when it is saturated it is not next to the internal standing leak guards. Also, so space on each side of the booster pad helps to use the diaper's own mat for absorption. I like to use a NorthShore Care medium booster with an Elite or a Megamax.

--John
(double incontinent)


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: New to this
PostPosted: Mon Jul 05, 2021 7:02 am 
Offline

Joined: Sat Mar 29, 2014 11:45 am
Posts: 1836
If you have convenient access to an adequate laundry facility, you might consider experimenting with washable protection. Because a full inventory of washables and plastic pants is so expensive, begin with a minimal order to determine whether they will work for you. However, if they do, and if you are willing to endure the cost, over time washables can be the most inexpensive solution. Surmounting the psychological hurdle of wearing diapers can make adjusting to washables much easier. Good luck.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: New to this
PostPosted: Fri Jul 23, 2021 12:46 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Feb 14, 2014 3:55 pm
Posts: 52
Location: Washington State
Megamax are really for people whom go a long time and only use the diaper. They are made to hold numerous large voids. I am guessing if you are having leakage problems, it is probably fit versus absorbency. My guess would be that you are using a size that is too big. You want to make sure the diaper fits snug against the skin, with no holes, yet not pinch. You also need to make sure you fluff the diaper and stand out the leg guards. I am between sizes myself. A few brands make a regular size. Seni, is the best brand i found.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: New to this
PostPosted: Thu Jun 09, 2022 4:53 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Apr 16, 2021 12:50 pm
Posts: 9
I have been quiet for a while as I was still experimenting. I have now pretty much gotten used to my new situation and made tremendous progress in both finding solutions and acceptance. Since I do have a fair amount of control left, I now use Seni man pads at home and also at the gym. They absorb very quickly and hold surprisingly large amounts when needed. I did have a few leakage incidents at the gym but not bad enough for others to notice. The pads also make it easy to change discreetly in the locker room.
For all longer outings I now wear Betterdry tab-style diapers without a booster. They fit me perfectly and I now know how to tape them reliably. They absorb very fast such that I don't experience any leakage at all until they get closer to capacity. I recently even wore khakis to a semi-formal event (albeit with plastic pants to be sure). They do bulk up quite a bit and anybody who takes an interest would certainly notice that I am wearing a diaper but this does not bother me much anymore. I have been all over the place including commercial airplanes, trips with friends and I am even riding my bicycle again. I am at a point that I would not care all that much if somebody asked me about my diaper. Interestingly, nobody has asked so far. The diapers are my new underwear and keep me dry and leak free.
I have even come to appreciate the perks that come with wearing a diaper like avoiding dirty or crowded public bathrooms.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: New to this
PostPosted: Mon Jul 11, 2022 7:07 am 
Offline

Joined: Sun Oct 20, 2013 3:45 pm
Posts: 1943
Location: North Carolina - Raleigh area
Congratulations HDT! It is obvious that all your experimentation has paid off. It is a pleasure to read a "success story" such as yours. You can serve as a role model for others. Well done.

Please be more active in the forums and share your experiences and obversations with us.

--John
(double incontinent)


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 10 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 16 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group