www.incontinentsupport.org

Before I start I want to apologise if I come over a bit nervous as this is my first time I have talked openly about my incontinence.
It is very strange to think of myself as being incontinent even writing (typing) the word makes me feel ashamed and embarrassed however I hope you all can help a bit.
I have a condition that means that the message to go to the loo does not always (most of the time) reach the brain on time and as a result I tend to have accidents. Over the years I have been consumed with timing loo breaks to a set schedule so I am not caught out. Having researched my issues and spoken with some advisors I have learned that I am actually incontinent and this scared the living daylights out of me . Having my life consumed with going to the loo did not seen a barrel of laughs. I made the decision a few months ago to grab some control back in my life and decided to take the plunge and revert to wearing diapers (I hate the word) and I now wear them 24/7. I am still getting my head around all this as I feel as if I have been hit with a train. I am so nervous when wearing diapers in public as I fear that people will notice and laugh not that it has happened yet.
Not wishing to go on for too long I hope this is a good introduction as to where I am at on the path I now find myself on.

Hi, greenbank, and welcome. You've come to a good place with meaningful support and advice from caring people. Don't be ashamed or embarrassed - we're all friends here dealing with the same issues.

Wetters

Welcome, Greenbank....there is no need to be nervous. I know that is easier said than done. We are all in the same boat to various degrees. We all have different ways of looking at our problems. I still have a problem with using the word incontinent when describing myself. For the most part I have enough control to make the toilet on time. My issue is that after I use the toilet I leak and drip have accidents. And I'm in the toilet 15 to 18 times per day so when you add all that up as up to a lot of accidents and a lot of wet pants. I despise the feeling of being wet down there so wearing protection was an easy compromise for me. My issue is that the urinary frequency is very disturbing and it causes a lot of disruption to daily life. Things have gotten so bad in the past month I have been given a prescription for Foley catheters by my urologist and I'm using catheters to manage at certain times when frequency gets out of control. My wife is an emergency room nurse and she is able to do the catheterization for me at home so I do not have to go to the emergency room every time I need to be be cathed. I have been to a Primary care doctor, 3 different urologists, a nephrologist, and I'm going to see another nephrologist and a neurologist coming right up. Nobody has been able to find anything yet, but yet I still live a substantial part of my life in the bathroom. I've been a guinea pig for all their tests, I have zero dignity left.....so, you're not alone, and very much among friends!!

Welcome to the forum greenbank, lots of good topics to read and chime in on, if you so desire, and lots of advice on just about anything dealing with this little issue in life... fun, ain't it? You sound much like I did, too embarrassed to even discuss it with my doctor for many years, the last thing I wanted on my medical record was "Incontinent"... oh well, it's there now! Puffy

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Puffy
BC, Canada
Fighting the "Bladder Battle" since 1995

At a certain point, though...your discomfort gets the best of you and you talk to the doctor about it, and then you end up at the urologist and they make you their guinea pig.......and after all this you start wearing diapers.....at first you hate them.....then you grow to accept them, and then some people even begin to love their diapers for giving them their life back and allowing them to be free from the confines of the house without fear of a wetting accident.

greenbank,

Please forgive my delayed welcome. But, please, understand that you are indeed welcome, among friends who understand your predicament because they share it.

I guess the reason I wear protection is that I have decided that living my life with all its obligations was more important than being tethered to a bathroom (loo). This past week I found myself in several situations which would have invited comment if the folks around me had known that I was wearing protection. They didn't, and I didn't tell them. I enjoy life's little victories.

Hi Greenbank and welcome to the forum. I trust and hope you will find answers and compassion here.

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"Why is the rum always gone?" - Captain Jack Sparrow

"There is no human problem which could not be solved if people would simply do as I advise." -
Gore Vidal

Welcome on board. Sorry you have to be here in the first place, however hopefully reading / hearing from others having similar problems may help you cope with it....well, I can say it did for me, having some to share my thoughts and frustrations with, but also (forgive me for saying it) but also good moments in here is a joy.

like when your wife finally understands, that it's not because you being lazy etc. and starts to understand and support you.

Welcome to the Forum,

I have enjoyed a tremendous amount of support since joining this group. I believe by talking about things that we find difficult to deal with that they naturally evolve to be more internally accepted by our own selves. As I've shared more of myself with people on this site, I've found myself much more forgiving of myself and my tolerance for all the hassles that come with incontinence has dramatically increased. And give yourself time. Wearing diapers or whatever form of protection you choose takes a bit of getting used to it. I think most people here would agree that we all get to a place sooner or later where we can fully accept and believe that no one else knows what you're wearing. If you choose to tell anyone, no one else really cares what you're wearing.

Hang in there. It gets easier. Really.

CJ