What to do?

[dp66]

I will be traveling internationally in the future, and would like some thoughts on how others have managed their incontinence. I will be with a group of 22 people on a pub tour in Ireland. This will not occur until May of 2021, but my anxiety is already surfacing. One couple traveling with my wife and I know of my incontinence and need to wear diapers, but the others do not. One of the couples I know, but are not aware of my issues. They may know about my prostatectomy, but I'm pretty sure they do not know that I need to wear diapers. My question is, should I tell that couple of my situation, or play it by ear? I will obviously need more luggage, so that might cause some questions. I also am somewhat anxious traveling with 20 or so others that I don't know. I'm probably way too premature with this question, but if anyone has experienced a similar situation, I would appreciate any advice? How did you manage? Thanks.

Dennis

[Patrick]

In recent years my wife and I have joined bus tours of Ireland and the national parks of Utah and Colorado. A useful trick is to use a vacuum cleaner hose to evacuate as much air as possible from a bag of disposables. You might be surprised at just how much air you can get out, and how much smaller the package is afterwards. In Ireland we visited several pubs; I carried a spare diaper and plastic bag for disposal in my shirt, and nobody was the wiser. However, you do need to keep your fluid consumption under control.

[Padded53]

dp66: Recently I was in a situation similar to what you are getting into.
My Wife and I were on a two-week driving trip in Europe with another couple that are very good friends of ours. They know I have some "prostate issues" but don't know the extent of my IC and that I have to wear diapers. I knew that space was going to be very limited in the car while driving around, not to mention I didn't want to drag around yet another suitcase. With this in mind I decided to use the same protection concept I used on a previous two-week trip. On that trip I used a premium pull-up (Abena Abri-Flex and Molicare Mobile) with a Male Guard pad. However using lessons learned from my previous experiences I tried to use a bathroom whenever available, even when I didn't think I needed to. This greatly reduced the number of pads I needed to use and also reduced the volume of the voids I couldn't control. When I felt a pad was full I got into a closed stall, removed and replaced the pad with a dry one concealed in my pocket. I simply rolled up the used pad and dropped it into the trash on my way to wash my hands, nobody was the wiser.

On our previous trip a bathroom wasn't usually readily available and this caused me to end up filling my pad/pull-up to capacity fairly often and risking a leak. Fortunately I didn't have any significant leaks but it was a cause for constant anxiety. This time it was a pain to be constantly using a bathroom but it did relieve my anxiety so it worked out OK and I had no leaks at all. I ended up using about 14 premium pull-ups, about 32 pads, and several flour sack cloths. I use the cloths at night instead of a pad since they absorb more and wick very quickly. In the morning I simply bagged and threw them out when I did have a night wetting. This added up to a volume about half of what 30+ good quality diapers would have taken up so it left me a good amount of luggage space for regular clothing. I realize this approach may not work for others with heavier incontinence but for my moderate IC it works very efficiently.

[Mr_Robin]

@Padded53: your suggestion is really brilliant. As my incontinence is moderate during the daytime I use premium pull-ups and use a bathroom as often as possible. However, I still have accidents once or twice a week (and thus need to change which is not easy). I’ll try adding a male guard. I’ll give you an update later.

@dp66: try Padded53’s suggestion first when you’re at home and tell us if it that suits you.

I agree with Patrick about fluid consumption but you still have to drink enough, otherwise the smell of urine will be stronger. You just need to strike the right balance.

[dp66]

Thank you for the suggestions. I keep thinking that someday this will be a non issue. However, it's been nearly three years since my prostatectomy coupled with the removal of a large diverticula so I'm not too optimistic. I've tried days without protection with some positive results, and some not. I haven't been brave enough to venture too far without some kind of diaper. The suggestion of placing a pad inside of a pull up, and removing it when wet therefore being able to continue wearing the pull up is something I may try. The problem I have with that is if I would have a flood I would have to change everything. That means removing my pants in order to change...more complicated. I guess that is why I prefer tape on diapers. I have almost a year to figure this out. Who knows what I'll be confronted with in that time span. I am now dealing with heart disease as well. I'm closing in of 73 years. This geezer stuff is getting harder and harder.

[Mr_Robin]

The problem I have with that is if I would have a flood I would have to change everything. That means removing my pants in order to change...more complicated. I guess that is why I prefer tape on diapers.

Changing a pull-up in restrooms is not easy, that’s right. So I put on a pull-up before going out. During the day I try to go to the bathroom as often as possible and before I feel the need to go (often too late when I wait). I always have a tape on diaper and wipes in my bag, so when I have a flood I can remove the pull-up without removing my pants and put on the fresh diaper.

[fiacs]

I wear a diaper with a booster. As others have suggested, I find significant convenience and peace of mind with the ability to change out the booster. Its much easier and more discreet to go into a stall, untape the diaper, replace the booster with a dry one and retape the diaper and throw away a booster than to change the entire diaper. This strategy becomes handy when I am traveling with other people when discreteness is a priority.

[Texan]

DP66,
I have been in similar situations working on a TV crew in Israel for 3 weeks several times. I used the Abena Abriflex super absorbent pullup and a Tena slip Maxi over the pullup. At night I used an Abena M-4 with a PUL pant over that, just in case! Since I was in the country for 3 weeks I was able to order supplies from a company there in Israel. They delivered right to my hotel. That way I was able to bring just a few days worth of supplies when I flew over. Your situation will be a bit different, but you are doing a great job of planning ahead. Feel free to PM me if you would like more information.
Gary