www.incontinentsupport.org

I have been having urge issues going on 4 months now and wear a diaper day and night. I have seen my GP and a urologist. They ran some tests and told me that there is no physical problem causing this. They both told me that it is stress/anxiety related and will go away. Well, it has been several months and it is not going away. I have good days and bad days and for the most part I am coping quite well. My wife has been really supportive throughout the whole thing and has no problems with my wearing diapers to manage the problem. This week we were talking about my bladder issues and she brought up trying medication to solve my incontinence. I have not read many good things about incontinence medications, both here and on other sites. The process seems to include alot of trial and error, the guarantee of unpleasant side effects and the possibility that they may not completely solve the problem. My reluctance to try them isn't pure laziness, I have dealt with the medication roller coaster in the past and i am really not excited about going through it again. Some background...

I have been struggling with depression/anxiety/panic disorder for over 10 years now. During this time, i had experienced symptoms of difficulty breathing, dizziness, headaches, the breathing issues being the most severe. I have been to many doctors, have gone to the ER more times than I can remember. I have been diagnosed with asthma and diabetes. I have been prescribed an albuterol inhalor and ended back in the ER with an albuterol overdose. It took 3 years of these symptoms and countless doctor visits to finally come to the diagnosis of Generalized Anxiety Disorder which was causing panic attacks that produced all of these symptoms. I don't have asthma or diabetes. Once the diagnosis was made I began the journey of trying to find a medication to deal with this. I have been on every anti-depressant invented and have suffered through a laundry list of side effects such as narcolepsy, anorgasmia, migraines, dizziness, weight gain, insomnia... After 2 years of trying medications I finally found one with the most tolerable side effects.

My reluctance to try incontinence medications stems from this experience. To go through another round of medication roulette, suffer through the side effects to come to the possible conclusion that I may still need to wear protection anyway does not make me in a hurry to try it. The fact that my wife brought it up is making me second guess this. She is fine with the diapers, just brought up the medications. Am I being a fool for not going back to the urologist and starting the process of medication? I am handling wearing diapers just fine, but I am only 40 years old, surely I can't be managing it this way forever? I apologize for rambling, just looking for other opinions on my situation. Thank you for your time.

Hey campingfool, as far as the meds go, I am at the same stage as you are, but I do not have any history like yourself. The more I research for myself, the more I do not want to try any of them, I can do without the side effects. I do wear a pullup during the day at work, for the "just in case' factor, but can count on one hand how many times I have slacked off on monitoring intake and time of day, and was glad I had something on, although I hate to have that happen at work to begin with as I am surrounded by a myriad of bathrooms, so really no excuse except for being too busy and inattentive. For trips out I use a Tena Super, which I am fine with for the time being, hoping all this improves, but after so long, I really can't see that happening, only getting worse. No visible cause for my urgency either, but have several suspicions. The last possible option is meds, but I really am leaning FAR away from that now, just does more harm then good in most cases I have seen/read about. Sounds like you have a terrific wife there, being that supportive and helpful. The choice is purely yours to decide, worth talking to both your regular doctor and the Urologist about your history and hesitation issues with medicating. Hope it all works out for you, keep us posted! Puffy

I'm very glad that you have found an antidepressant that works for you, and you are extremely lucky to have a supportive wife. About 30 years ago, I went through a very serious period of depression and anxiety after my wife divorced me partly as a consequence of her inability to cope with my incontinence and need for diapers.

I think that your decision about whether or not to try drugs for your urge incontinence should depend in part on whether the incontinence drugs are likely to interact in a negative way with your antidepressant. Your physician needs to check up on the potential for drug interactions.

If it looks like it is safe to take both kinds of drugs at the same time, trying out the incontinence drugs might be worthwhile. They do work well for a lot of people. My urologist has tried six different drugs for me. The severity of the side effects varied from drug to drug, mainly dry mouth and aggrevation of sinus congestion. Unfortunately, none of the drugs provided very much relief for my severe urge incontinence. However, if we had found one that worked well, especially if one of them had worked well enough that I no longer needed to wear a diaper, I would have been willing to put up with the side effects.

Thank you both for taking the time to respond. I think I am going to go back to the urologist and talk to him. Like you said, explain my feelings and see what he has to say. I will try to have an open mind about the meds and see what happens. I'm not sure how I am going to handle wearing diapers in the heat of the summer so that is also going through my mind.

What a bummer, was really hoping this was going to go away on its own.

Anyway, what a nice bunch of people on this site. It's been very helpful to have this a resource and have read damn near every post here. Thanks again for the support.

Regards

--Jason

Howdy Jason
My advice don't go there. But then hey they might work for you. You may be the one that doesn't get hit with the side effects. If you do get hit with the side effects just remember being diapered and otherwise feeling normal isn't all that bad of a way to live ................Sandy

Thank you for the feedback Sandy.

I have a few questions regarding diapers in the summer, if I may.

I wear the Abena cloth backed diapers now, are they going to be too hot in the summer? Should I consider trying to "downgrade" to pullups and play around with my fluid intake and bathroom timing?

Powder or no powder?

Are there any tips/tricks to wearing diapers in the summer that are handy? What are some absolute do's and don'ts?

My wife is concerned about me going into the summer wearing diapers as she is not sure if I am going to handle the heat well. This is her main reason for bringing up the medication.

Thanks again for the help and support

-Jason

Plan on changing more frequently because you will sweat more and it can soak the diaper much faster in the heat. If you don't tolerate the heat well stay with a "breathable" diaper. You still need to change more frequently.

_________________
When life hands you a lemon, make lemonade.

Hi Jason
Never restrict fluid intake especially water! It's hard on the body when you do. Also another down full your urine will become much more acidic which can cause more rashes. I myself am a huge fan of J&J medicated cornstarch babypowder. I could do without the smell but the stuff works good for me. in the summer I like to put it on heavy. Most of the time when I change I do it in a sitting position. I lay the diaper out and put the powder on the Diaper then put it on this way it's not on your hands when you go to handle the tapes For me I find the cloth like gives me rub burns in the summer on the inside of my legs So I tend not to use cloth like when it's hot out. I find the smooth plastic are much better when it's hot out. You will find as already stated you will need to change more often due to the sweat factor. If you need the Heavy or at least better than average protection you my want to try the Molicares this summer..............................Sandy

Sandy

I am surprised at the comment about cloth backed diapers vs plastic backed. I would have thought that the plastic backed ones would have kept the heat in and therefore made it more uncomfortable....hmmmm...interesting.

I have been trying out a plastic backed diaper called Dry 24/7. They seem OK. The Molicares you mentioned, are you referring to the purple ones, the Super Plus?

I don't do real well with the heat and have had heat rash issues, even before wearing diapers. Memories of the pain walking through Disney World in August dance through my head.

I guess I am going to be spending more time in my pool this summer

Hey campingfool, I use a cloth back Tena Supers, and I personally fnd them better for breathability then the plastic backed ones, be it Depends or Molicare, Abena, what-have-you. I guess everyone evaluates how they find them differently, like everything in life... Just makes sense that the plastic would not breath very well and act more like a heat shield, keeping the heat and moisture in. Puffy