www.incontinentsupport.org

Hello,
I have a 13 year old daughter. For about 2 weeks she has been going to bed 5 nights out of 7 days. We cannot find causes. Since we don't want to wash the bedding all the time and the mattress is starting to suffer and there's no improvement in sight, we (my husband and I) have decided that we'll start wearing diapers at night again. I also taught my daughter as gently as possible and in the end she agreed to it.
I then went to the medical supply store and got advice. Since pant diapers were too expensive for me, the saleswoman recommended that I use diaper inserts and plastic pants. I then took a package of diapers and 3 diaper pants with me.
When I got home, I put everything in my daughter's room so that she could get ready in the evening. The next morning the bed was wet again. I asked my daughter if she had taken the diapers. She told me that she put the pads in the panties. I told her that she had to wear plastic pants instead of panties. But she said that she thinks it's stupid to wear plastic pants and definitely doesn't want to wear them. She has been wearing the pad in her normal panties for 3 days now and bed linen and pajamas are wet in the morning. The plastic pants stay in the closet and are not worn.
What can I do now? I can hardly dry her off on the bed like a baby in the evening.
Does anyone have any advice?

As a parent, you are going to have to be more assertive about the consequences of your daughter not following your guidance about her bedwetting. Make rules with consequences. Make her responsible for washing at least some of her clothing or bedding.

Explain clearly that it is not childish for her to need to wear an adult diaper and that she is not responsible for a medical condition. Instead, it is childish not to address the issue. Mention that many adults wear diapers and no one notices.

I sympathize about the cost of diapers, but please note that inserts in plastic pants are unlikely to work. The least expensive way to buy diapers is from an online vendor. Buying diapers by the case can save a considerable amount of money. Of course you first must experiment to find what works for your daughter.

You also need to protect that mattress as the problem is unlikely to go away soon.

I also sympathize with parenting a 13-year old. I have raised two.

I have been wearing diapers 24/7 for over 11 years.

--John

Assuming that no serious medical issue has been found, learning to manage her enuresis should become a simple task of growing up. Finding protection that works, that she is willing to use, may require experimentation with various washable and disposable alternatives. Good luck and keep us informed.