www.incontinentsupport.org

As I sit outside on a beautiful Saturday waiting for my order from xp I begin thinking about everything.
I saw my primary care physician yesterday and she referred me to a neurologist and suggested that I use barrier cream to prevent rashes.
Another doctor who will see me in diapers and another hospital visit with more people seeing me in diapers.
Having to talk to my doctor about diaper rash is incredibly embarrassing. Especially at 38.
I'm single and feel like I'm never going to find someone who will deal with my incontinence.
My parents want to fly me out to see them for thanksgiving and my aunt and uncle don't know. So there is that.
And I've been sitting outside for 3 hours waiting for FedEx. While watching people my age walking by enjoying their lives. I dunno. I guess I'm just depressed.....

Hi justej

I am the same age as you and have similar feelings I do use a barrier cream at times however following a strict hygeine routine link below helps a lot.

http://www.incontinentsupport.org/chap6.php

I have watched many prison films over the years and just like full strip searches for inmates. I have come to the conclusion that being incontinent is just the same however in diapers infront of medical people. I have resigned myself after initial shame and embarrisment to this fact and now sadly part of my life and just get on with it.

Diapers are the best thing to happen to me no fear of wet clothing, I now look at people of my age and say I can do what you do now. Diapers are a part of me now I feel bad when I have accidents though as I did the other week however the people here were great.

If your family love you they will understand and even supprise you with their reaction.

Take care you are not alone in what you are going through.

Greenbank

thanks greenbank.
im still struggling to find the right diaper for the right price and quality.
like i said, i got my shipment of A+ from xp yesterday, but they just arent what i need.
ive been having tape problems with them and i think i need an elastic waistband. (i have a little tummy on me and they the diaper tends to fold down.) i think im going to get a case of comfidry when i get paid since they are only $15 more and just deal with the A+ until then.
im grateful for diapers, but its a constant reminder that im not continent.
and when you have trouble with the ones that you have, are on disability, and dont have much money its extremely frustrating.
thanks again for responding, its good to know im not the only one at my age dealing with this.
im going to try to get together with some friends today. lets hope that i dont have any diaper issues.

Hi justej

I wear compression pants over my diaper and plastic pants as this helps a lot. Lycra shorts are the same I have found a great pair from Gilbert designed for netball however are ideal under shorts or a skirt if you are a female. I now wear Molicare Premium Soft Super Plus all the time and are such a great diaper are a bit expensive however have stopped luxury purchases such as chocolate etc as want security, dryness, happiness.

Look after yourself hope the social gathering goes well.

Greenbank

justj,

The sag from all cloth-backed diapers is terrible . I think you will find that an elastic waist band on a cloth-backed diaper will not keep it from slipping down when saturated.

Greenbank is quite correct with regard to wearing compression pants to stop the sag. They can be found in almost any sports clothes department and last forever.

Otherwise, wear a onesie (my favorite).

--John

The problem I'm having with the A+ from xp is the tapes keep ripping!!! Ugh it's driving me nuts.
I have on a pair of underwear that's helping them stay on when they rip but its so frustrating.

I definitely get the depression, at 33 I have dealt with the medical staff acting like I was too young to have this problem. Like I don't know that? Like that tidbit of information will make the issue go away? Ugh, I hope that you feel better and don't forget to live! You can still date, even if incontinent.... it just might be a bit more difficult. As for diapers, well I wear the ConfiDry 24/7 at night but am looking for the ideal daytime diaper within the parameters of what the VA will cover. Happy hunting for the perfect product.

_________________
When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.

Marcus Aurelius

justj,

Re the tapes, I share your frustration, but just automatically reinforce the tapes and forget about it. That way you can tape the diapers as snug as you wish.

Don't let it become a source of stress for you or cause a good diaper to fail.

--John

Justej,

Have you tried Abena X-Plus? IT seemed to me that Abena had better tapes than the A+ level 4. I would recommend the northsore air supreme..but they have recently had security issues.
Hope this helps!

Peace out!

Rob

_________________
"We cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love" Mother Teresa

"THERE ARE FOUR LIGHTS!" - Captain Picard from Chain of Command, Part II

Depression can be worse than incontinence. Incontinence rarely kills; depression can kill, and too often it does. But saying that we all get depressed is of no use whatsoever. I guess that's one reason I come here. I expend a tremendous amount of energy managing my medical situation. It is a challenge that will last as long as I live. The worst feeling that incontinence forces on me is the feeling that I'm no longer in control of things that folks around me take for granted, that I took for granted before this happened to me. However, if I'm no longer I control, I do still have influence. Yesterday I drove more than 200 miles on the Pennsylvania Turnpike, going to and from a wedding. I pedaled my Prius as hard as I could, but 70 mph traffic, wall-to-wall trucks, construction barriers, and no place to go should an emergency occur gave me white knuckles. That's incontinence. I am proud that I emerged unscathed. And I'm proud that nobody except my wife knew that I was wearing protection. Nobody knew that every bite of the wedding banquet came back on me, or that the hubbub of conversation and loud music about drove me insane. I guess that taking pride in my management skill is my antidote to depression, aided and abetted by the support I get from folks here. For that I am grateful.