Seeing things worse than they are????

[DDS]

My lady friend has been an angel in getting me to look at my incontinence in a whole new light. I've been dealing with incontinence issues for over a decade now. Over the years I have adjusted mentally to my situation and came to accept being incontinent as part of my life. However I always felt "broken" and would often get angry that I would be dealing with incontinence the rest of my life. It took my very understanding lady friend to assure me that I have been seeing my incontinence issues much more relevent than other people do. In other words I was making too big a fuss over something nobody really cares about. She has totally accepted my lack of bladder control and has no issues with me wearing diapers for managing my incontinence. With her love and support my outlook on life has changed considerably.

[Gimwet]

Hi DDS--

Congratulations! Those among us with supportive and understanding partners/family are the luckiest, to be sure. My wife of almost 28 yrs. has taken all this in stride very well, supports me in my researching of various management methods, and has never made a negative statement.

I do think we who are incontinent hold a responsibility here, which is to do everything in our power to manage our own problems and the work associated with them. I do the diaper laundry, I change the bed if the pad didn't completely catch leaks and I do everything I can think of to prevent odors from causing discomfort in our bathroom (diaper pail for cloth) and bedroom (diaper bin for disposables). I'm luckier than some here, who need assistance to change, etc., and I recognize this----gratitude helps, I think.

Thanks for your post---it helped me see my situation for its positives, too.

Gimwet

[SeattleDoug]

Maybe one day I will find that "someone" to care more about who I am then what ails me. I have no problem taking responsibility for managing my incontinence. I do it now anyway. Most of the single ladies that I have met in my area are either tied up with their careers or have children. I don't have a problem with children. I just don't feel like getting hitched to someone just so I can support her kids again. Whoever I meet needs to like me for who I am, not the size of my wallet (or lack of).

[Don]

I have been with my wife for 11 years. She knew me before I became disabled. She has stuck with me since then too. She helps me see the brighter side of things and tries not to make a big deal out of things that are minute. Her only condition is that I not leave wet diapers in the bathroom trash next to the toilet. I take my diapers out every day and throw them in the trash. As long as I do that, she doesn't complain.