Whats worse?

[Don]

I have type 1 Bipolar Disorder. I was diagnosed in 2008 at the age of 25. I was wondering which do you think is worse...having bladder and bowel incontinence...or the Bipolar Disorder. Right now, the bipolar is stable. I'm not having too many symptoms. In the past, it has cost me a few jobs and I almost lost my family. When I was first diagnosed, I had to be hospitalized repeatedly to get it under control. I was voluntarily admitted 10 x in 2 years. My first year was complete hell. I had a psychiatrist who just kept pushing meds at me because I could not be controlled. He overshot my medications by alot. I became toxic. I was sent to the naval hospital in Bethesda, MD for 10 days so they could strip my meds away from me and bring me back down to safe levels. Before they did this, I could not function. I could not care for myself, dress myself, show up to work on time, or drive. I couldn't do anything. It was so bad. Shortly after my stay in Bethesda, I became more stable. I was able to function but I began experiencing symptoms of urge incontinence. I went to a urologist who tied by incontinence to my psych meds. He blamed my urinary incontinence on a medication called Depakote. I have long since come off that med but the incontinence remains. I now take a med called Lithium. The Lithium stablizes my mood but causes frequent diarrhea. Due to the frequent diarrhea, I have occasional bowel incontinence a couple times a week. I have tried many different medications for the bipolar. Like 25 or so over the course of 3 years. The meds I take now work the best at stabilizing my mood. Without the meds I would have symptoms of bipolar ranging from severe, debilitating depression to mania with psychotic features. The Lithium and other drug I take called Saphris keep these side effects in check. I haven't been depressed in over a year and have not been hospitalized since last July. And it was only for 3 days. I have been doing remarkably well on this medication. The Lithium has also caused my thyroid to function improperly. It has become hypoactive. So I take a med for that. I have gained about 15 lbs. I also have nocturnal hypoxemia causing me to breathe really shallow at night and have to sleep with oxygen through a nasal cannulator. I have to wear the diapers because of my incontinence. Its not the end of the world. I'd rather wear diapers and be stable than be unstable and single and in the hospital all the time. Looking at it this way, the incontinence isn't all that bad. I have tried numerous medications for the incontinence. But have failed them all. I don't look at it thought like I failed them, I see it as they failed me. So which do you see is worse? I think the Bipolar Disorder is far worse than the incontinence. I can manage that easily. It certainly makes for an interesting life. But it has made me more grateful for the things I do have now. I appreciate things so much more!!!

[Puffy Pants]

Well Don, that is certainly not an easy question to answer, but all in all, I would have to say incontinence. You can manage it much easier, often with no medications needed, and it does effect your day to day activities, but with re-planning ahead it can and is done every day. Bi-polar is much more difficult to get a handle on, and effects you, as you know, in a much more significant way, sometimes shutting down your entire life until things get balanced out which can also mean hospitalization to do that. I do not envy you or anyone else that has this daily battle on their hands, but I am glad to see you have a good support system around you, and docs who listen to you and want the best in your treatment. Your attitude will get you through, that is for sure. I also appreciate your posts on the forum, you raise some interesting questions and offer good advice to others that have to get this type of disorder in check. Puffy

[johnstone]

I agree with Puffy Pants. Your attitude is positive and says a lot about the type of person you are. There is no question which disability is easier to manage. This forum as more than doubles in size since I joined, and there are so many people here the are incon for all kinds of reasons. Stay positive and just take it one step at a time.